Hanyou Times Two
by TwistedHilarity
Summary: A mistake costs Miroku his full humanity, and now there's not one hanyou, but two. And there's an awful lot of fun that a hentai hanyou can get himself into, after all... rated for future chapters. MirSan, secondary InuKag romance, humor, lang,lemon
1. Let the Punishment Fit the Crime

Disclaimer: The characters of InuYasha are not mine, they are property of Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

A/N Well, I've had this up at another site for a bit now, and I since so many people here at FFnet have been so supportive to my first story, I figured I kinda owed you it here, too. If the lemons get a bit too hard core I may just have to tell you where to find them as opposed to posting them here, but at the moment it's all good.

Enjoy!

Chapter 1 – Let the Punishment Fit the Crime

Inuyasha bolted upright, instantly wide awake, and was already plummeting to the ground below before he consciously registered the masculine scream that had woken him up. _Miroku?_ Looking down at the dark camp below him as he leaped, he noted the monk's absence from their camp even as he started scenting the air. Kirara and Shippou, woken by the same cries, started towards him but Inuyasha waved them back as he found the scent trail.

"I'll check on him; guard the girls!" he called out. He heard the scream again and sprinted as fast as he could into the woods, hit with an odd sense of déjà vu. The same scream had echoed through the forest mere hours before. The only difference being that it had been preceded by a large thud and Sango's scream of 'Hentai!' He ferverently hoped that the monk's obvious pain, this time, stemmed from a just such an innocuous cause.

Catching a glimpse of Miroku's dark robes through the trees, he leapt over the brambles separating them to find the monk groaning quietly as he lay in a heap on the ground. Inuyasha snorted, trying to keep his nose clear as he detected Miroku's scent mixed with something new. _Hanyou? Was he attacked by another hanyou?_

"Miroku, are you all right?" he asked carefully, unwilling to touch him until he knew how he'd been injured. "Where are you hurt?"

"I'm afraid I may have miscalculated slightly." Miroku said, his voice muffled as it lay pressed into the ground.

Relaxing, his mind calming with the knowledge that at least Miroku was well enough to talk, Inuyasha shook his head at his idiot friend. Realizing that Miroku was suspiciously close to the spot he'd used to spy on the girls earlier in the day, Inuyasha grumbled. "You miscalculated? So, what else is new? What'd you do this time, try to peep at a youkai or something?"

"Celestial maiden, actually," Miroku mumbled, and Inuyasha started to laugh until he realized that the houshi wasn't joking.

"What, seriously? Are you crazy? You're lucky she didn't blast you into oblivion, you stupid lech!" He shook his head. The man had shit for brains when it came to females, honestly.

Miroku pushed himself up by the arms and looked Inuyasha in the face for the first time, shrugging sheepishly. "I know. She was so beautiful, though…"

"Tell someone who cares, monk," Inuysha griped, then paused as he really looked at the man in front of him. His hair had come completely undone, hanging down and framing his face. His head looked, well, lumpy, and something was different about his face, he just couldn't put his finger on what it was. "Miroku, what the hell happened to you?"

Sitting fully upright, Miroku rubbed the back of his neck and chuckled slightly at himself. "I'm not really certain. She said something about my obviously having been improperly cursed."

"What the hell does _that_ mean?"

"If I recall correctly, the Maiden said that if I was, eh, sniffing around women like a dog, she'd make sure that at least they all had sufficient warning ahead of time." He shrugged again, bringing his hands together in his lap. "I'm not certain what she did, exactly. It certainly hurt enough," he muttered.

Looking at his friend closely, Inuyasha inhaled again. He was _still _smelling hanyou, but if there hadn't been one at the pool, then where the hell was it? His eyes widened in shock as he saw movement from one of the lumps on Miroku's head. "M-Miroku! You've got _ears!_"

"Of course I have ears." Miroku rubbed his aching forehead with his hand.

"No, you idiot, you've got _ears!_" Inuyasha reached for the top of the houshi's head and grabbed the small, dark set of dog ears perched there, blending in perfectly with the man's dark hair. Miroku yelped in pain and slapped his hands away.

"Ow! Damit, Inuyasha, what are you…doing?" Miroku paused as he realized just where Inuyasha's hands had been and his hands flew up to the top of his head to feel his new puppyish ears. "What in the world…." He yelped again as he felt piercing pains streak down from the top of his head and brought his hands down to stare at the sharp claws that he'd just accidentally bloodied himself with.

"I- I- "

"You're a hanyou," Inuyasha said in a quiet, awed voice. "Damn, Miroku, I didn't even know this could be done. You must have _really_ pissed that female off."

"I suppose I must have…" Miroku's voice was shaken as he tried to come to terms with what was happening. "But…are you certain I'm a hanyou?" he asked Inuyasha in a plaintive tone.

"Hell yeah. I've been trying to figure out where the hanyou scent was coming from since I got near the springs, and it's been you the whole time. I can smell you really well now that I'm near and know what to look for." Inuyasha paused a moment and then grinned suddenly. "Hell, what am I saying? _You_ should be able to smell just as well now."

Miroku frowned a moment and then sniffed tentatively, shaking his head almost immediately. "What the- what _are_ all those smells?! Oh my Gods, the world reeks!" He clamped both hands over his nose and then winced as he accidentally clawed his cheeks at the same time. "How do you live with all these smells?? This is just… Is that excrement I'm smelling?!!"

"Huh? Oh yeah, some boars took a crap somewhere nearby. And of course the mice are always shitting and pissing everywhere, and I guess the rabbits and birds too, come to think of it."

"And I can _smell_ it? That's revolting! Merciful Buddha, I'm going to have to cut my nose off of my face!"

"Eh, you learn to block it out. Don't worry." Inuyasha looked at him closely, trying to take it in. Miroku…a hanyou. A brief, guilty surge of pleasure swept through him. _I'm not the only one, anymore._ He felt instantly ashamed at such a selfish thought. Miroku hadn't asked for this. Well, not technically. The man was a monk, their spokesperson, their mediator, their one spark of respectability, no matter false it might be. If there wasn't a way to reverse this, what was he going to do? Would he be able to deal with all the shit thrown his way as a half-breed? Although maybe Inuyasha was selling him short. Miroku so seldom seemed surprised by the vagaries of human reactions, maybe he'd adapt better than Inuyasha ever had.

He watched Miroku keeping his hands plastered against his faced as he moaned about the stench around him. Then again, maybe the monk might need a bit of help.

"C'mon, houshi," he said gently, "let's get you back to camp. We'll see what we can figure out there."

Miroku nodded, refusing to remove his as he got to his feet. He let go with one hand to pick up his shakujou and started walking back to camp with Inuyasha. "Damn, what in the world is Sango going to think about this?" Miroku muttered to himself.

With a short laugh, Inuyasha smirked at him, "You mean after she knocks you unconscious for peeping?"

"Uh, yes, after that…"

"It'll be interesting, that's for sure." Thinking of the women, however… "Uh, Miroku, before we get back… don't lose it when we see the women, or I'm going to have to deck you, got it?"

"Excuse me? Simply because I happened to watch _one_ celestial maiden does not mean I am going to turn into a ravening beast…uh, well, not more of a beast than this…not that a hanyou is a beast, really, but…"

"Shut up, already, moron. It's just that if you're having trouble blocking out smells, you might have a hard time when we get back. Hell, you grope Sango all the time when you're human, it's obvious you have less self-control than a drunken lord. And if you start smelling, well…"

"Smelling? Smelling what?" Miroku said, still keeping his hand tightly against his nose as they walked.

"You realize you look like an idiot when you won't move your hand off your face, don't ya?"

"What about the smells, Inuyasha!"

"Uh, well…women have a scent to them…"

"That's not new information," Miroku said, grinning widely underneath his hands. Inuyasha blinked a moment at seeing fangs peer out from behind that familiar smile.

"Yeah, but it's a _strong_ scent, houshi. A really, really strong scent, and it can be a little overpowering sometimes. You have to make sure you don't try to, uh, well, jump 'em or anything. Got it?"

"Are you saying that Kagome and Sango are going to smell so - good – that I won't be able to refrain from assaulting them? Don't be ridiculous, Inuyasha. I have more self-control than that."

Watching his friend who still looked like an idiot with his hand childishly over his face, Inuyasha sighed. "We'll see."

"Don't worry so, Inuyasha. I'll be fine," Miroku said bracingly, inwardly a little amused that _he_ was the one who was cursed, and yet here he was having to reassure his friend. He was a little curious, though, about what the girls would smell like. Sango might smell _better_ than she usually did? It just might be worth turning into a hanyou for that alone…

Back at camp, Sango and Kagome waited anxiously with Shippou and Kirara, trying to stay calm.

"Are you sure you heard Miroku?" Sango asked for the twentieth time.

"I think so." Shippou sighed, wishing she would stop pestering him about it already. About to go on, again, about what it had sounded like, he bit his tongue as he saw Inuyasha and Miroku come through the trees. He stared, uncertain of what he was seeing. Were those dark Inuyasha ears on top of the monk's head??

"Miroku! Are you all right? What happened?" Kagome blurted, coming to her feet and rushing towards the couple, followed by a silent but worried Sango. Both women screeched to a halt as Miroku entered the firelight.

"Miroku? What happened to you?" Sango asked quietly, watching dark ears twitch on top of his head. His indigo eyes reflected the firelight like a cat's. "Miroku…you're a- a-"

"A hanyou," Miroku responded, his voice muffled through his hands. He looked at her speculatively. _A really strong smell, huh? _ Now that he was near the women, he could find out exactly what Inuyasha was talking about. He slowly eased up the pressure on his abused nose and inhaled carefully. Wood smoke, Inuyasha, Kirara, Shippou… It was fascinating how scents he hadn't ever thought about before were now so prominently displayed in front of him. So far, though, it wasn't all that overwhelming. _Much_ better than the smell of shit permeating the forest. So, let's see, he thought, tilting his face up as he inhaled again, there was Kagome's scent, which was…very nice. He inhaled again, smiling slightly. It was very, _very_ nice. And then, Sango. Sango's smell was…Holy Buddha and all his Virtues.

Inuyasha was watching Miroku carefully as soon as the man had released his nose from its hand prison, and he tensed when he saw Miroku's eyes dilate suddenly as he inhaled. Miroku's mouth dropped open and he started inhaling rhythmically, staring at Sango with avid, hungry eyes that were usual for a youkai, but certainly not expected on their usually mild mannered monk. _Shit, here it comes._

"Sango," Miroku practically growled, his hands completely dropping from his face as he took a step towards her. "Dear Gods, what did you do to cause that amazing –"

"Shut up now, monk. You'll feel like an idiot later if you don't," Inuyasha barked, and groaned to himself as Miroku continued to walk towards Sango as though in a trance. Shit, he _knew_ this was going to be trouble. Stupid houshi and his stupid lecherous ways. Crap.

Sango, never an idiot, was starting to back away from the lecherous monk. "Miroku-sama? What are you doing, houshi?"

Miroku continued to stalk the taiji-ya silently, his breathing growing heavy, and Inuyasha sighed. This was going to be a pain. He leapt over Miroku to land next to Sango, pushing her behind him. Having placed himself in between his stupid friend and the current object of his fixation, he narrowed his eyes and confronted him. "Hold it right there, dumbass."

Miroku's reaction was immediate and completely unexpected. He charged Inuyasha, growling, and back handed him across the face, knocking him into a tree yards away.

"Mine!" Miroku snarled, and then blinked as reality intruded. Staring at Inuyasha as though stunned, he was speechless for a moment as he realized what he'd done.

"Inuyasha? Blessed Buddha, I didn't mean to… I can't believe I just did that! Inuyasha, are you injured?" Hurrying over to his annoyed friend, Miroku gave him a hand up, only to have his conciliatory gesture met by Inuyasha's quick, painful jab to his face.

"Ow!"

"Feh, you deserve it, dumbass. I was just trying to stop you so you'd calm down and think a minute. And you hit me for it? Asshole." Inuyasha grumbled as he popped up and shook himself.

His brow furrowed, Miroku apologized. "I'm sorry, Inuyasha, I truly don't know what came over me. I've never done something like that in my life!" He looked back at the women on the far side of the clearing, shivering.

Had he really shouted 'mine' out loud, in front of everyone? What had he been thinking? Sango wasn't his! He didn't even WANT her to be his! Hell, as soon as he was free of Naraku's curse, he planned to pick a nice, plump, welcoming widow, hopefully a rich one, and spend the rest of his life being pampered and pleased and doing exactly as he wished. He certainly had no interest in a beautiful, opinionated female warrior who couldn't even appreciate the compliment he gave in worshipping her fantastic, amazing ass that was just so damn tempting and…

_Crap, now he was hard. The damn woman was a menace._

_Who smelled so fucking GOOD he wanted to roll the soft vanilla scent around in his tongue and then spread it across her skin like butter. _

"Ow, dammit!" Miroku suddenly found himself staring up from the ground. He picked himself up from the ground, rubbing the side of his head where Inuyasha had punched him.

"Focus, monk! You gotta control this!"

"I'm aware of that! I do know how to control my body, Inuyasha. You may recall: Buddhist monk, meditation? I am not unfamiliar with restraining myself when necessary."

"That was as a human. It's a whole different thing to control youkai emotions and instincts, you idiot!" Inuyasha hissed at him. "Crap, you don't think I get pissed and irritated all the time just because I have no control over my emotions, do you?" At Miroku's sheepish expression, Inuyasha snorted in irriration. "Youkai blood is really strong, Miroku. It's a constant strain not to, well, let it out. Hell, the fact that I have to have a fucking sword to seal my blood should be a huge fucking clue that this is nothing to play around with! You gotta get control of this, and fast, or you could hurt someone."

Nodding, Miroku looked back at the girls, who were carefully staying on the far side as the two males talked. "Yes, yes, you're right. I'll treat this seriously. I may need your aid, but I should be able to keep myself contained now that I know what to expect, I'm sure."

Miroku continued to stare at Sango and as a shift in the wind brought her scent over to him again he was mortified to hear himself whine like a puppy. He clamped a hand over his mouth as Inuyasha chuckled briefly.

"Down, boy." After a glare from the houshi, Inuyasha shook his head. "It gets easier. Honest. But if you need to stay away from them for tonight, I can go with you, if you like."

Taking a deep breath and releasing his mouth, Miroku shook his head. "No, I don't think I'd want that. What if something happened to them? I can deal with this. I _will_ deal with this." Nodding resolutely to himself, Miroku walked slowly back over to the center of camp. Noting Sango and Kagome's wary staring, he shrugged sheepishly.

"Sorry about that. It's all still a little, uh, new to me." He took a deep breath and immediately regretted it. Dear Gods above, Sango smelled so damn good! He swallowed quickly as he felt in danger of drooling. Actually drooling! He was already as hard as a rock after only a few whiffs of the Taijiya's scent, and he tried desperately not to start whining again. He could do this. He _could_ do this!

"Please," Sango's voice was soft and worried, "what happened, houshi-sama? How did this happen?"

"Well, as to that, " Miroku looked to Inuyasha for inspiration only to meet a rather mocking stare. "I was up, eh, heeding the call of nature as it were, when I heard a sound, and when I went to investigate, merely thinking someone was in trouble, there was this…celestial being, and…"

Sango and Kagome looked as one in the direction Miroku had come from, glanced at each other, and sighed. "You peeped at a celestial maiden, didn't you?" Sango asked coldly.

"Now Sango, it wasn't like that."

"No? What was it, then?"

"It wasn't peeping so much as my attempting to- to render assistance. My intentions were completely misunderstood."

Sango and Kagome snorted in unison.

"You were peeping and she cursed you, didn't she," Kagome said, with at least a little more sympathy in her voice than Sango, Miroku noticed.

_At least Sango isn't attacking me,_ he thought, only to leap out of the way as she swung the hiraikotsu at his head. He stumbled, shocked, as his leap took him 10 feet away to the other side of the clearing. Sango stared at him, looking even more surprised than he was, and he smiled briefly. He'd dodged it! Not only that, he'd dodged her swing with room to spare!

Looking at her open mouth, breathing in her scent, _again_,

…couldn't she do something about that?

He watched her. She'd missed. In fact, considering how fast he'd been able to move, and how far away, would she be able to hit him at all when she tried? Did that mean he could have the pleasure without the pain? Groping with no consequences? More than the occasional, fleeting touch, possibly? This change had some interesting possibilities…

He lost the thought as the hiraikotsu came flying across the clearing and knocked him clear off his feet before returning with a graceful arc to the beautiful woman who was glaring at him even more fiercely than before. All right, he thought, rubbing his jaw as he sat back up, so he'd still have to keep on his guard, but that didn't mean this didn't bear thinking on.

Miroku got to his feet again, noting briefly how much _less_ painful it was to do so than earlier in the evening when he'd received essentially the same blow. Inuyasha always seemed to recover from his wounds with exceptional speed, would he have the same ability now as well? A hanyou's speed, his sense of smell, his constitution…what else would he have? Walking back towards the rest of the group, who were already settling down again now that no one was in danger, he paused as he thought of something else.

As a hanyou, did he retain any spiritual powers?

The thought was profoundly disturbing. For all the teasing he received on his impurity and impiety, he'd worked enormously hard to build his spiritual energies to the point that they were an effective weapon. Would all that be completely negated now? Was all that struggle lost if he was something completely changed? He walked over to Inuyasha and pulled out an ofuda, slapping it onto Inuyasha's head and letting out a relieved sigh as it blew the hanyou onto his back. He peeled it off and was rewarded with cursing and yells.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing, you fucking idiot?"

"I worried for a moment that perhaps my spiritual powers wouldn't be accessible in this form. Thank you for helping me dispel that particular worry, Inuyasha," Miroku said calmly as he settled down next to Shippou.

"Dispel this, you asshole!" Inuyasha tensed to leap at him.

"Inuyasha, osuwari!" Slam!

"Thank you, Kagome-sama," Miroku said, edging closer to express his gratitude, only to receive a sharp slap to the side of his head from Sango. "Sango!"

"Keep your hands where we can see them, houshi," she said unsympathetically. Then she looked to the prone Inuyasha and smiled slowly. "Kagome, those beads work on Inuyasha because he's a part youkai, right?"

"That's what Kaede said, yes."

"Do you think that means we could get a set for Miroku now that he's part youkai too?' she asked, smiling even broader as she looked back to the houshi edging quickly away from her.

"Sango!" Miroku looked at her in horror. "You wouldn't dare –"

"Just something to keep in mind, houshi-sama, the next time you try to put your hands where they haven't been invited."

"But you can't really mean –" She merely stared at him a moment and he swallowed and turned to the least frightening member of their party at the moment: Kirara. "She doesn't mean it, does she?" For some reason, Miroku would swear that Kirara rolled her eyes at him before flicking her tail and walking over to Sango.

Inuyasha laughed shortly as he was pushing himself up from his crater in the dirt. "All the women are pissed at ya now, idiot. It'd serve you right if you _did_ get subjugated. And I'm tellin' ya right now, I will personally laugh my ass off at you every fucking moment if that happens. Hell, I'd almost _pay_ to see it happen."

"I don't appreciate your lack of support right now, Inuyasha. Truly, I have gone through a terrible experience…"

"Which you brought on yourself by being such a pervert."

"…I've been physically assaulted…"

"Which you brought on yourself by being such a pervert."

"…and now I'm being threatened with near slavery…"

"Which you _will_ bring on yourself if you don't stop bein' such a pervert. There seems to be a trend here, monk." Inuyasha smirked at him.

"I am trying to point out that I find myself suddenly cursed, in a body completely different from the one I'm accustomed to, with new potential difficulties and issues to deal with, and instead of concern, or even a smidgen of empathy, all I've received are- are taunts and physical abuse! I could use a bit of sympathy, dammit!"

Sango and Kagome looked at each other and felt a bit ashamed of themselves. It was true. The poor man had obviously gone through something pretty traumatic, really, and they were treating him as though nothing much had happened.

"I'm sorry, Miroku," Kagome said quietly.

"I'm sorry as well, Houshi-sama," Sango said coming closer to pat him sympathetically on the shoulder.

"Thank you for such a gracious apology. I appreciate your acknowledgement of my suffering."

Sango suddenly stiffened as she felt a familiar warmth rub gently over her bottom. "You stupid hentai!" she twirled around to slap him only to find him a few feet away smiling mischievously before her hand made contact. "I take it all back! You deserve everything you got, you- you lecherous monk!" she grumbled as she stomped back over to Kagome. "Stupid, lecherous idiot…hasn't changed at all…don't know why I even felt sorry for him."

Kagome shook her head sadly as she looked at Miroku, watching him hang his head a little sheepishly at her silent admonishment. Inuyasha was the only one who could tell that Miroku was really turning his head slightly so he could better catch Sango's scent. _Crap, the idiot is going to be unbearable at this rate._

"C'mon, you dumbass, let's get back to sleep. You've kept us all awake long enough." He grabbed Miroku by the arm and dragged him away from the women a bit, punching him in the head once with a muttered "and that's for the ofuda, asshole."

Kagome and Sango bedded down next to each other, with Shippou and Kirara keeping them company as usual. Miroku tried to calm his breathing as he lay there, but found it almost impossible to block out the new sensations he continued to experience. The night seemed brighter, the insects louder, and he _still_ couldn't get over how good Sango smelled. Kagome's smell was starting to fade into the background, thank all the Gods, but Sango's seemed to be growing more prominent at the same time. If he didn't know better, he'd swear she was doing it on purpose just to retaliate for whatever offenses she held against him.

Sighing deeply, he turned away from the women and closed his eyes, hoping to get at least a little rest before dawn broke and he had to truly face up to everything that had happened to him.


	2. Vanilla

Disclaimer: The characters of InuYasha are not mine, they are property of Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

A/N All right, here's the second chapter. I've only got three written so far…I think. Maybe it's four? I'm too lazy to check right now! So, the first couple here can go up within a few days, and after that it may take a little longer (On Adult Fan Fiction I've got five more stories aside from this that I need to finish, too, so it sometimes takes a bit!)

Let's see, warnings: language, sexual references.

Vocabulary: fundoshi – a Japanese loincloth

Chapter 2 – Vanilla

_Why did it have to be vanilla,_ Miroku moaned to himself as he rocked back and forth, trying to ignore Sango and her proximity and most of all her fantastic, amazing smell that made him want to run over and pound into her until he made her pass out from the sheer joy of it.

It shouldn't be so hard to ignore! It was merely a smell. Surely ignoring one fifth of his senses was not beyond his abilities?

As the scent of vanilla and jasmine drifted over to him and his member sprung to attention, he moaned again. Gods, why did it have to be VANILLA?? Vanilla and cherries, the scent of the oils used in his favorite brothel of all time. He'd never been able to encounter either scent without becoming a little aroused ever since his first night with a courtesan there. It had never been anything like this, though! This was ridiculous! Every time her scent hit his nose, he was instantly as hard as a rock. It was painful and frustrating and it didn't help that she was so near and unaware that he likely could have been on her, and in her, before she was even fully awake. If it weren't for Inuyasha's periodic glares directed his way, he might have given into temptation and simply jumped Sango.

In his brief periods of lucidity, he was certain that Inuyasha's presence was a good thing. He would never wish to force a woman, after all. On the other hand, he thought he just might die, literally die, if he wasn't able to find himself between Sango's thighs in the very near future.

_Vanilla and plums now._ He looked over and realized he could hear her regular breathing all the way across the camp. She'd fallen asleep again. He'd seen her wake a number of times, when he'd been unable to keep his discomfort silent, and a part of him noticed her smell changing. Jasmine and vanilla when she was awake, plums and vanilla when she slept. He wondered, with the small part of his brain that wasn't occupied thinking up new sexual positions that would tax even Sango's flexibility and stamina , if that always held true. Would he be able to tell she was asleep merely by her scent?

Would he be able to tell when she was completely vulnerable? Soft and vulnerable and open to him…when he could come up to her and tear off her clothes and take her before she could even blink. He groaned again, his erection pressing uncomfortably against his fundoshi.

What was wrong with him to think of such violent things!! Inuyasha looked up again at his noise and shook his head.

"Will ya just go to sleep already? You're fucking keeping me up, houshi," he snapped quietly.

"I'm trying!" Miroku whispered. "It's just- how do I ignore the smell! I can't get my body to stop reacting to it! How do you deal with Sango's smell?!"

Inuyasha's brow furrowed. "Sango's smell is still bothering you? Huh. My mind just kinda blocks it out. I thought Kagome's was getting to you."

"Kagome? No, I hardly even notice it anymore. But Sango… I've been aroused for hours!"

"Welcome to my world," Inuyasha grumped. "If it's not the youkai blood, it's the damn smells. Trust me, being aroused for a few hours is nothin'. Wait until you've got an erection that lasts a whole week long. See how fucking easy it is to keep from acting like an ass when you're brain hasn't had any blood for seven days."

"A week?" Miroku looked at him, horrified. "You've gone without release in this state for…for an entire WEEK?" His respect for Inuyasha jumped several notches. An entire week, and none of his friends had died by the hanyou's hands; that alone was impressive.

Although his view of Inuyasha's stupidity jumped as well.

"Why didn't you simply visit a brothel? If you went at night, and covered your ears, surely you could find a woman to obtain release from?" There was no way in the entire world he was going to last a week this way. He wasn't certain he'd be able to last the night!

"It wouldn't help," Inuyasha muttered. "If one scent gets you up, you can either screw the person with that scent, or do without. You go near another female and you'll go limp faster than you can blink. Trust me, I've fucking tried."

Inuyasha saw Miroku's shocked stared and smiled evilly. "Oh, and in case I forgot to mention? If you're an inu-hanyou, which it looks like ya are, you better be DAMN careful when you have sex. Lose control for a minute and bite her and WHAM, you've got yourself a mate. You'll be limp dicked around every other female for the rest of your frippin' life. Well, unless you killed her off, then you'd be able to get it up again, I suppose"

Miroku's horrified gaze made Inuyasha chuckle darkly. "Nothing to say, monk?"

"That's simply the most barbaric thing I've ever heard. You bite someone during sex and you can't be with anyone else?? I can't believe…Wait, just how easy is it to lose control during sex?" Miroku thought quickly. It could be done, if he was really careful…

"Well, let's just say that the first time I was willing to take the chance was when I had a hard on for 15 days in a row and thought I might go insane before I got rid of it. Didn't matter, a course, because I went limp as soon as I tried anything, but at least the damn erection went away. Until I walked back into camp, of course, and then it came right back with Kagome's stupid scent. And Miroku, I've been practicing keeping my blood in check for a couple a hundred years, so you can see how much faith I have in control during sex, eh?"

Miroku wanted to beat his head into his hands. He'd thought being a hanyou might not be all that bad. The women smelled wonderful, he still had his spiritual powers, and his body was stronger and faster than he'd ever had it. But…perpetual erections and no sex? He risked staying with just one woman, forever, if he had sex? FOREVER!!! The celestial maiden had obviously been a beast from hell in disguise, because no one other than something made of pure evil could have come up with a curse so profoundly horrendous.

_Vanilla and Jasmine._

"DAMMIT!" Miroku snarled and finally pushed himself to his feet and stomped stiffly out of the camp, followed by a chortling Inuyasha.

Sango and Kagome were greeted the next morning by an exhausted and irritable hanyou couple stomping into camp.

"I'm FINE!" Miroku yelled as he stormed out of the trees, purple shadows dark under his eyes.

"You're fucking anything but fine! You need to control your…"

"Shut up, Inuyasha!" Miroku turned and swung at him as the other hanyou leaped out of the way.

"You are just _askin'_ to get pounded, monk!" Inuyasha growled.

"Oh really? I'd just love to see you try, hanyou!"

"You may get your wish, HANYOU!" Inuyasha and Miroku stood and glared at each other, chests heaving and clawed hands flexing with temper.

Sango and Kagome looked at each other in surprise and cleared their throats simultaneously.

"WHAT!" Miroku and Inuyasha turned and responded in one voice, turning their glares to the women.

Sango stared at Miroku, Kagome stared at Inuyasha, and they both shook their heads.

"It's like watching twins bickering." Kagome said, shaking her head.

"Irritating, immature twins who have yet to learn any manners." Sango finished. Miroku flushed vividly and Inuyasha sneered.

"Keh." Inuyasha turned away and walked over to the campfire where the girls had already set up breakfast. He grabbed a portion and sat down to eat without saying another word.

Miroku took a deep breath, winced as more smells hit his body like a hammer, and tried to walk as nonchalantly past the women as Inuyasha had.

I have manners, I have control, I can do this, I will NOT jump Sango and make love to her until every nerve in my body goes numb.

"Thank you for breakfast, ladies." He managed to say softly.

They nodded, slightly appeased, and sat down with the men to break their fast. Shippou bounced around a moment until Kagome handed him some food as well, and Miroku tried to ignore everyone's stares as he ate quietly.

"You haven't put your hair up." Sango said.

"Eh, no." Miroku reached up to finger his free flowing hair nervously, "It feels a little too odd to have it pulled back and realize I don't have any ears on the side of my head anymore."

The women nodded while Inuyasha snorted irritably. "Your fucking ears aren't there whether you pull your hair back or not, idiot."

"That's true, but this way it is less of a shock to my system." Miroku said calmly, proud of himself for not kicking Inuyasha the way he desperately wanted to. He was having such a hard time not reacting violently to every little irritation that each victory felt like a small miracle.

"Have you thought of going to the springs to see if you can find the celestial…"

"Been there this morning already. She's fuckin' gone." Inuyasha interrupted the slayer. "Neither of us can find a scent trail leading out, no big surprise. If we can change him back, it ain't gonna be by the same person who cursed him."

"I am hoping that possibly Kaede-sama might have some ideas, or at least might know of someone who might be able to assist me in ridding myself of this curse." Miroku said quietly.

"Yeah, good fuckin' luck there." Inuyasha snorted, and Miroku resisted the urge to hit him yet again.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome chided him, and Sango glared as well. "You should be more supportive!"

"Yes, Inuyasha. Don't you wish to help your friend in need?" Miroku asked, enjoying watching Inuyasha's fists clench as he, too, resisted the urge to get into a fight.

This is actually rather fun, now that I'm not as worried that he can actually hurt me.

"Keh. C'mon. If we're gonna go, let's fucking get moving and get this over with." Inuyasha grumped, watching impatiently as Kagome and Sango packed up the camp. Miroku attempted to help gather up a few items, but when he accidentally punctured two cups of ramen in a row with his claws, the women shooed him away. He stood next to Inuyasha, feeling rather useless.

"Crap, this is taking fucking forever."

"You could always assist them, Inuyasha, if you are so eager to leave." Miroku said, watching the women carefully as he did so.

"Keh, that's stupid. Why would I do that when they're already doin' it?" Both the women stopped and turned to look at him. Miroku smiled.

"Inuyasha," Kagome's voice said, and Inuyasha winced, "osuwari!"

WHAM.

Miroku chuckled to himself. That had been almost as satisfying as hitting Inuyasha himself, and all it took was asking the right question.

It was good to have an actual mind.

Vanilla and Cherries.

NO! Not the two scents together! He'd almost gotten soft again finally, and now he was harder than diamond! He started to pant, watching as Sango angrily gathered the last few things of the camp and he felt like crying.

When she's angry it's vanilla and CHERRIES? His favorite two smells in the entire world, when she was angry??

"The world truly does seem out to get me lately," he whispered, and Inuyasha, finally out of his small crater, smirked as he looked at him.

"Seven Fucking Days, Monk," he whispered under his breath.

"You're enjoying this far too much," Miroku whispered back.

"Misery loves company."

Miroku looked a moment at Inuyasha's pants and realized that the front of blousy red hakama weren't as loose as he might have assumed. So, Inuyasha couldn't ignore the women, or his woman, either. Wonderful.

"Can I at least do something about this on my own?" he whispered rather desperately, imagining riding on kirara for hours with a hard on rubbed over and over as they moved…with Sango in front of him within easy reach. He gulped, staring at her intently as he thought of it.

"Yeah, you can go take care of yourself, but there's only so many times a day you can do that shit before you rub yourself raw, monk," Inuyasha whispered back.

"But, if it gave some relief for a while…."

"Only until you walk back into the damn camp," Inuyasha murmured. At Miroku's confused stare, he smirked at him. "Inu-hanyou don't have to wait before they're 'ready to go,' monk. You'll be just as hard, just as fast as normal, the second the damn smell hits you again."

Miroku started to whimper. "I don't think I can do this!"

"Doesn't look like you've got a choice, monk." Inuyasha smiled evilly and Miroku clenched his hands as he fought to urge to leap at him. If he couldn't get rid of his sexual frustration one way, perhaps pounding on his friend until that smile left his face would suffice. He took one step when Sango called out.

"We're ready to go," she yelled, and as Miroku watched Kagome climb onto Inuyasha's back, he looked speculatively at Sango.

"Sango, don't you think Kirara looks a bit tired?" he asked innocently.

"Tired?" Sango looked at the neko youkai and frowned. "Do you think so?"

"She's seemed a bit droopy lately. But perhaps I'm being overly concerned…"

"Droopy." Sango's face grew worried.

_Vanilla and jasmine. Wait,.. jasmine again?_ Miroku looked at her worried face and suddenly felt better. The exact same scent as last night, and she was worried? _Was she worried about me last night? How sweet._

"Perhaps we would do better to let her rest today." He moved closer, his almost neon indigo eyes watching her closely, "I'm sure I could let you ride on my back as Kagome and Inuyasha do," he said, striving for casual.

Sango's scent went from jasmine to cherries, distracting him with an even more painful erection, so much that he didn't see her move until his head was to the side, his cheek stinging.

"Hentai! Worrying me over Kirara just to give yourself a – a chance to be a pervert!" She glared at him.

"You malign me unjustly, Sango." He rubbed his cheek and held onto his newfound temper with an effort. Did she have to slap him? What did it matter if he had been looking forward to a position where his hands would be holding onto those strong, round thighs of hers for hours at a time? A position where her body would have been flush with his, her breasts pressed up against his back, her…

He saw Inuyasha smirk at him slyly as he hefted Kagome up a moment and Miroku glared, realizing that he could smell Inuyasha's arousal.

That lecherous bastard! He's been enjoying carrying her like this the entire time! 

And they thought Miroku was a hentai? He couldn't stop himself from growling under his breath and the low feral sound startled him out of his temper.

"Miroku, was that you?" Sango asked in surprise, taking a step away from him.

He tried to smile. "I- I'm not quite used to the sounds I can make yet, Sango. That's all. Apologies!" He waved his hands apologetically and followed Sango as she went to Kirara, stopping short as she held up a hand.

"Where do you think you're going, houshi?" she asked.

"Eh? On Kirara…"

"As you just reminded me, you're built like Inuyasha now, monk. You can keep up just fine on your own." She smiled with false sweetness and Kirara leapt into the air to leave him standing on the ground staring after them with his mouth hanging open.

"You can carry ME, Miroku!" Shippou spoke up from behind him and he turned, resigned, to let the kitsune clamber up to hang onto his shoulder before he started running after Inuyasha and Kirara.

_At least I can't smell her anymore._


	3. Beads and Behinds

Disclaimer: The characters of InuYasha are not mine, they are property of Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

A/N Thank you for all the nice reviews! I'm glad you've enjoyed it. Hope you enjoy this one as well. All I can say about this chapter is…poor Miroku, and wow is he pig. Don't worry, I'm a big believer in everyone getting what they deserve, heh.

Warnings; language, slapstick violence. ( :-D)

Chapter 3 – Beads and Behinds

Miroku arrived at Kaede's out of breath and exhilarated. He had run the entire way and competing with Inuyasha, trying to outdo each other as to who could leap the highest or run the fastest, had been a completely unexpected but enjoyable part of their journey. He'd never even considered engaging in that sort of play with the hanyou; it would have been an exercise in futility before. But now…testing his new body and its capabilities was vastly entertaining.

Still grinning widely, he watched as Kirara landed, Sango dismounting to join Kagome as she waited for them.

"Did you see Miroku!?" Shippou blurted as he hopped between the two women's shoulders, "He's just as fast as Inuyasha now!"

Inuyasha took a swing at him. "Is not, runt. I can still kick Miroku's ass any day of the week."

"Care to wager on it, Inuyasha," Miroku asked quietly out of the side of his mouth.

"Oh, you can bet your ass I do." Kagome and Sango drew near and Inuyasha scowled slightly. "Later."

"Definitely"

Sporting innocent looks, or in Inuyasha's case, his habitually grumpy look, the two males looked over at the approaching women. Sango snickered.

"You know what, houshi? That innocent grin of yours worked much better when you didn't have fangs. It loses something in the translation now, I think."

Kagome laughed lightly and nodded. "I have to admit, Miroku-sama, your grin is a lot more…well…"

"…predatorial." Sango finished, smirking. "I think that maiden cursed you just right. You look exactly like a lecher when you smile like that," she said smugly.

Miroku's smile faded and he tried not to scowl. He was trying so very, very hard to stay away from Sango and her damn smell, which had changed again to vanilla and lemons now, dammit, and she mocked him for it? Aroused and wanting her so badly he ached with it, had he done anything to her? No! He was being sooooo good, and rather than appreciate his restraint, she called him a lecher?

I'll show her a lecher.

He smiled again and leapt over, reaching out to squeeze her ass briefly before leaping away. "Is that better?" he asked, still smiling, and Sango gasped and sputtered as she glared at him.

"Hentai!" she yelled.

"I didn't wish my smile to be out of character, Sango," he said, his eyes darkening as he looked at her. Her face turned crimson and she grabbed Kagome's hand and started walking to Kaede's hut.

"Come on, Kagome. We don't want to be anywhere near the pervert right now, if he's acting like this," she said fiercely.

Miroku smirked at her back even as Inuyasha shook his head. "You're really asking for it, monk," he said quietly. "You just watch, she's gonna find some way to get back at you if you're not careful."

"Don't worry, Inuyasha. I'm sure everything will be just fine," Miroku said lightly, following the women calmly as he smiled to himself. It had to be. Kaede couldn't help but have a solultion, he was sure.

A few minutes later, Miroku sat in Kaede's hut, his claws clicking against each other as his fingers fidgeted.

"Well, Kaede-baba? You know how the hell to get him back to normal?" Inuyasha asked.

Kaede shook her head, still staring curiously at Miroku as she'd done from the moment the group had arrived in the village. "I have never seen anything like this in all my years."

"But you must have some idea of how I might deal with this curse?" Miroku asked hopefully.

"I'm afraid not, Miroku. I've not heard of anyone or anything that could change a creature from human to half-demon, or full demon, except for the shikon jewel or possession. I know of no way to alter you back until the jewel is whole."

Miroku swallowed heavily. "You don't? No idea at all?" His voice was weak.

"I'm sorry, Miroku, but I believe you are stuck in this form for as long as the shikon jewel remains shattered."

Miroku's head dropped forward dejectedly a moment and then snapped back with a smack as Sango 'eeped' and slapped him.

"Hentai!"

He smiled sheepishly, rubbing his cheek just as Inuyasha slapped him on the back.

"Oh well. Guess you're stuck as a half-breed, lech."

"Yes. So it would seem," Miroku mumbled.

"Eh, it's not that bad," Inuyasha said bracingly. "C'mon, I'll show ya."

"What?"

"C'mon!" Inuyasha yanked at his arm and pulled him, stuttering and protesting, out of the hut.

Rubbing her bottom and scowling, Sango turned to Kaede as soon as she could no longer hear the two males. "Kaede, I think I'm going to need you to get me something…"

Miroku let himself be taken as far as the bone eaters well before he finally got tired of being dragged like an empty sack of grain and yanked his hand free.

"This is far enough, Inuyasha." He was tired and rather heart-sick over the fact that he might be stuck in this particular form for, potentially, quite some time.

"Yeah, guess you're right." Inuyasha looked positively gleeful, and Miroku watched him warily. The past day, Inuyasha happy usually meant some new painful information for Miroku to deal with. "Okay, go punch that tree."

"Excuse me?"

"Just do it. Go punch that tree, hard as you can."

Rolling his eyes, Miroku hit out at the tall vegetation Inuyasha had pointed at and stared in surprise as he made a large crater in the middle of it. He knew he was stronger, but still…

Inuyasha's eyes shown. "Slice it." When Miroku looked at Inuyasha's sword in confusion, the silver haired hanyou sighed. "Not with a sword, stupid, with your claws."

Flexing his fingers slightly, Miroku shrugged and clawed out at the tree. A series of deep lines appeared on its surface and the woody giant toppled over with a crash as he watched, impressed.

"All right, I admit it, that's impressive," Miroku said, staring at it. "What else?'

"Nothin', that's it."

"Beg pardon?"

"That's it. You have just seen pretty much the only good shit about being a hanyou."

"But you said…"

"Yeah, well, I figured I'd get you outta there before you started really whining. Because honestly, bein' a hanyou sucks. A lot. Humans hate you and try to kill you, demons hate you and try to kill you, you've got one night a month where everything actually CAN kill you, and don't forget the sex."

"The sex?"

"Yeah, the 'little' problem that you've been having since you turned hanyou? Well…wait, listen for it…"

"What?" Miroku whispered.

"Do you hear that? That, my friend, is the sound of your dick crying."

Miroku glared at Inuyasha and punched him in the shoulder. "Ass."

"Heh, really had you listening there, didn't I? Ha."

"It can't be as bad as you're painting it, Inuyasha, Miroku said, staring around them.

"Yeah, actually, it can." Inuyasha shot back, and then he sniffed the air. "Sorry monk, gonna have to save some of my mocking ya for later. Smells like Kagome's making ramen tonight, and I'm not fuckin' missin' it."

Inuyasha ran off and, after staring around him and feeling rather lost, Miroku followed. Maybe if he was lucky, the ramen would be a more powerful smell than Sango's. Maybe, but he doubted it. Not the way his luck had been going lately, anyway.

He wondered what the smell would be tonight. Vanilla and what? Lemons? Plums? Cherries? He felt his mouth start to water and cursed, adjusting himself as he continued to walk. Dammit, he wasn't even smelling her yet and it was still turning him on.

Maybe Inuyasha was right. Being a hanyou just plain sucked.

He got back to camp, smiling at the women until they glared at him suspiciously and he remembered what they'd said about his fangs. He slumped next to Inuyasha, thanking Kagome for the ramen. Actually, with a better sense of smell, the noodles were actually quite a bit tastier than he remembered. Maybe there was something to Inuyasha's love of ramen after all.

"Miroku?"

He looked up to see Sango standing in front of him. "Yes?"

"I just wanted to apologize," she said calmly, and he swallowed, feeling himself get hard again as her scent drifted to him. _Vanilla and cherries._ Didn't she smell that way when she was angry? She wasn't acting angry, but… maybe he still had some things to figure out about this smell thing.

"Apologize?" he asked hoarsely, wishing she wasn't so close so he could reach down a moment and make things a little roomier inside his fundoshi.

"I know it's been a blow to find out that Kaede doesn't know how to put you back, and I wasn't too sympathetic…" her voice trailed off and she shifted her feet nervously. "So I got you a peace offering. Something to make things easier to be a hanyou."

How thoughtful. "Thank you, Sango," he said softly.

"Here, close your eyes and I'll give it to you," she said, and he let his eyelids drop immediately, anticipating. It had to be a kiss. That was what women always gave you when they asked you to close your eyes. Unless you were already in their bedroom, and then it might be a lot more than a kiss. Sango was going to kiss him! Gods, he could really use something sexual right now, even if it was just lips.

"Miroku, watch ou-" Inuyasha yelled out.

"Osuwari!" WHAM.

He felt something drop over his head and onto his chest and he opened his eyes, confused, to see beads and teeth handing around his neck.

"What the-"

"Oh Miroku?" Sango said sweetly.

"Y-yes?" he asked, still staring at it. It couldn't be what he thought it was, could it?

"HENTAI!" she yelled, and he felt himself dragged down until he face planted painfully into the ground.

Spitting dirt, he got to his feet, cursing.

"Why you vindictive little…"

"Hentai!" WHAM.

He spit out dirt again, seeing Inuyasha sitting up by then and shaking his head sadly at him.

"You LIED to me! You said you had a gift, dammit!"

"Yes, and you thought it was something perverted, didn't you , you hentai!"

WHAM.

"Oh, sorry! I didn't mean that one! Wow, it really is easy to do it accidentally, isn't it?" Sango said conversationally as Miroku painfully rose to his feet again.

"Told you," Kagome said calmly, looking not perturbed at all to see him pounded into the dirt.

"I can't believe you would do this to me!!" Miroku yelled, fighting his temper for all he was worth.

"Well I wouldn't have had to if you weren't acting like such a hentai!"

WHAM.

"Dammit, will you stop saying that!!" Miroku yelled from the ground.

"You know, I wonder if we shouldn't have picked a different word," Kagome mused, and Sango nodded faintly.

"It might not have been the best choice."

"Putting them on me in the first place wasn't the best choice either!" he growled, tensing to pounce on her and…well, he was sure he could think of something.

"Don't you come near me, Miroku-sama!" Sango threatened, and he ignored her and sprang.

"Hentai!"

WHAM.

"Son of a BITCH!"

"Well, don't try and attack me!" Sango said, her voice a tad shaky.

What did she expect him to do, simply sit there and take it?? He could not believe…

"You might as well give it up, Miroku," Inuyasha said from the sidelines. "Trust me, you're just gonna end up in a lot of pain." He added in an almost inaudible whisper that carried to Shippou and Miroku's ears only. "Like I said…being a hanyou sucks."

Miroku glared at Inuyasha, then glared back at Sango.

"I'm going on a walk," he spat, and stomped out of the camp.

The next week felt like one, huge blur of pain and humiliation.

Sango walked ahead of him, hips swaying, and he reached out to just lightly touch her beautiful bottom and…

"Hentai!"

WHAM. Dammit, forgot about that.

…She and Kagome had gone to the hot springs and he'd crept up, just to guard them of course, and how could he guard them if he couldn't see them and…

"Hentai!"

WHAM.

…His hand touched her bottom as she bent over in front of him.

"Hentai!"

WHAM.

…His hand brushed her breast as he was passing food.

"Hentai!"

WHAM.

Eventually, he didn't even have to do anything before Sango flew off the handle.

…"Sango, could you pass me the…"

"Don't touch me, you hentai!"

WHAM

…"Sango, are you over here?"

"EEEEK! You peeping tom! HENTAI!"

WHAM.

…"Sango…"

Slap. "Hentai!"

WHAM

…"Kagome, have you seen Sa-"

"Leave Kagome alone, you hentai!"

WHAM.

After seven days of non-stop eating dirt, and doing so with a hard on crushed underneath him as likely as not, he was ready to kill himself…as long as he could take Sango with him. He swore, if he ever got those damn beads off, she was going to be soooooo sorry.

As he finally got a chance to go to the hot springs, his first chance to wash off the filth all his sudden meetings with the ground had left, he was surprised to feel the hanyou patting him on the back as they walked.

"Y'know, I didn't think it was possible, but I believe you may have gotten more 'hentai' in one week than I've got 'sits' in a whole two years, monk."

"Yes, I've noticed." He groused.

"Heh, sucks to be you, don't it?"

"Oh thank you for your kind words of sympathy, Inuyasha," Miroku growled, stabbing his staff into the dirt as he walked.

"Hey, it's not like I did it to you or anything. Hell, I even tried to warn you once I knew it was coming, didn't I?"

Remembering Inuyasha's attempted outburst, he nodded. "Frankly, Inuyasha, I might be able to tolerate even this insult if it weren't for the fact that I have a hard on all day long! Do you know how painful it is to be pinned to the dirt with your dick smushed flat? Do YOU!"

"Uh, yeah, actually, I do," Inuyasha muttered, and they both sighed.

A small speck flashed past Miroku's eyes and he looked curiously at Inuyasha's shoulder where it landed.

"Why so glum, Master Inuyasha?" an old voice piped up.

Oh, it was just Myouga.

Wait, Myouga. Myouga knew things. Myouga knew things about hanyou!!

"Myouga! Thank the Gods!" The flea youkai looked at Miroku in surprise.

"I'm sorry, but I don't believe I know….Miroku??" The small flea jumped from Inuyasha's shoulder over to Miroku's and inspected him.

"I don't believe I am familiar with such a change, Miroku. How did you manage such a feat?"

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "He didn't do a damn thing except peep at the _wrong_ female. Far as we can tell, he's stuck this way."

"Truly remarkable." Myouga said, taking a taste from Miroku's neck before the monk slapped him.

"Myouga, I'm begging you, you have to help me!" Miroku whined, holding the squashed flea in his hand. "You know about youkai and hanyou, don't you?"

"I am quite knowledgeable about the subject, yes." Myouga preened slightly.

"Good. So tell me, how do I ignore Sango's smell!!"

"Hey, that's a good idea, monk. I never thought of asking the little coward."

"I beg your pardon, but are you asking me how to ignore…a scent?" Myouga asked tentatively.

"YES!" Miroku nearly yelled.

"I'm sorry, Miroku, but I would think Master Inuyasha would be the one you need to talk to about something like that."

"Feh, I don't have a fucking clue how to make the woman's smell go away. It just faded for me, but he can't seem to get it out of his head." Inuyasha snorted as he looked briefly at Miroku's crotch. "Either of his heads, actually."

"Hmmmmm, a woman's scent that you can't ignore?" Miroku nodded morosely, "Well now, that's a different story."

Both Inuyasha and Miroku's ears perked up and they looked at Myouga intently.

"You know how to make it go away!?" Miroku asked. Oh thank the Gods, he could FINALLY get rid of that damn erection.

"I didn't say I could get rid of it. I simply know what it means."

"What it means?" barked Inuyasha. "What, it fucking 'means' something if there's a wench whose smell won't leave you alone."

Miroku looked slyly at Inuyasha. "Like Kagome's smell, possibly?"

"Kagome? The miko's scent refuses to dissipate for you? Oh, Master Inuyasha, I'm so happy for you!" Myouga jumped over to the confused hanyou only to be smacked for his trouble.

"What the hell are you going on about now!?" Inuyasha growled.

"You found your mate!" Myouga crowed, bouncing around on top of Inuyasha's shoulder.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Inuyasha picked up the flea between his fingers and scowled at him.

"Your mate. Every Inu-youkai has one female whose scent is so intoxicating that he can't seem to get it out of his mind. That's the sign that this is the female who you can mate with. You've found your mate, Master Inuyasha!"

"Wait, "Miroku looked confused, "I thought an inu-hanyou simply had to bite someone during sex and they became mates."

"Certainly not." Myouga scoffed. "That's not how mating works at all. It's only with a specific female. You could bite a whole legion of women and nothing would happen other than getting them a little bloody. Where did you hear such a ridiculous story?"

"Inuyasha…" Miroku growled at his friend who had wisely stepped away, albeit with a huge grin on his face. "You LIED to me??"

"Hell yeah!" he started laughing, "And you believed every fucking word, you stupid lech!"

"You… " Miroku took a number of very deep breaths as he restrained the urge to walk over and pummel his friend into the ground. "Make no mistake, Inuyasha, I'll make you regret this. I am going to make you pay. With so much pain that you'll apologize, on your knees, for even thinking about mocking someone with such a cruel, underhanded..."

"The day I apologize on my knees to anybody is the day I die, monk," Inuyasha sneered.

Miroku resisted the urge to hit him yet again. "So was it all a lie, then? I could have simply gone out and found a willing woman and gotten some relief ANY TIME I wanted in the past few days??"

Inuyasha snorted and gestured to his hakama with his hands. "Does it look like that part was a lie?" he asked. Looking at the bulge filling out the inu-hanyou pants, Miroku sighed.

"Wonderful. So, I won't get stuck with a woman by biting her, but at the same time, the only person who my dick will stay up for currently is Sango unless I choose to stay away for long enough that her smell fades, is that it?"

"Unless she's to be your mate," Myouga interrupted.

Miroku stilled as he looked at the small flea. "Did you say…mate? For ME? No. No, I'm sorry, but I'm simply a temporary hanyou. There is no possibility that this…mating…scent… Sango is NOT my mate."

"If her scent overpowers all others, than I must disagree, Miroku. Once you've detected the scent of your mate, your body won't respond to another female again unless your mate has passed away." Myouga smiled, his small eyes turning dreamy. "It's wonderful. A scent that arouses the passions so fervently that a man cannot resist. What a beautiful moment it must be…"

Inuyasha and Miroku both started choking.

"Wait, wait…so does that mean _Kagome_ is the woman I'm supposed to- to- "

"Bond with?" Myouga finished. "If her scent is having that affect on you, then quite definitely. I am so happy for you, Master…"

"Why the hell didn't you tell me this before!!? I've been living with a damn hard on for over a year, you little bastard! I coulda used the information just a little fucking sooner!!!"

"Eh, I didn't realize you were unaware of that particular aspect of inu culture, Master Inuyasha." Myouga said sheepishly.

"DAMMIT TO THE FUCKING HUMAN HELL AND BACK!" Inuyasha yelled, punching down into the ground. He stood up, panting heavily a moment before something occurred to him. "So this means…if I make her my mate, I won't have to live this way anymore, right? Her scent won't turn me on and leave me that way for days at a time. RIGHT?" he grabbed the flea from where he'd jumped to the ground and squeezed him as he asked.

"That should be correct." The little flea choked out, gasping for breath as Inuyasha released him. "Although her smell should still be very, ahem, intoxicating, you can take care of the problem in the…eh…traditional manner."

Miroku wasn't certain, but he thought the little flea was actually blushing.

"Well, damn, let's get on it, then! C'mon, monk."

Miroku shook his head. "Forget it. There's no way you'll get me to believe that _SANGO_ is the person I'm…destined to be with. Mating is for life, isn't it?"

"Between inu-youkai and their mates, yes." Myouga said.

"And can't I have sex with anyone else, ever?"

"Only if your mate passes from this plane of existence, as the Inu Taisho's first mate did."

"Then there is no possible way I will take a woman for my 'mate.' If I even had a clue how to go about doing such a thing in the first place, which I do not."

Inuyasha grinned fiercely at him. "Miroku, you don't get it, do you? It doesn't matter if you mate with her or not, you're screwed. You found your mate, dumbass, and you're a hanyou now. Your body doesn't give a shit whether your mind wants another woman or not; it knows the mate is there now, and it won't _let_ you take another woman. This ain't the same as just a sexy smell; you will NEVER be able to get it up for another woman, ever. So…it's take Sango and get to have a sex life, or leave her alone and live as celibate as a mainland monk. For the rest of your damn life."

Miroku looked at him, stunned, before looking at the flea for confirmation. "He's simply teasing me again, isn't he?"

"I'm afraid not. If you have found your body's mate, you won't be capable of procreating with another. Just her."

Miroku moaned slightly and fell onto his ass. "No one else? EVER?" Myouga shook his head and the monk groaned again. "But…Sango? Do you know how badly that woman would hurt me if I ever tried to do something sexual to her?? She's been beating me to a pulp all week long with these damn beads, and sometimes it's for nothing more than looking at her funny!"

"Well, you gotta point there. Maybe sometime when she's asleep?"

Miroku swallowed, standing slowly as he contemplated the possibility of never having sex again, and nodded. "All right, what do I have to do?"

"Ehhh…Myouga?" Inuyasha passed the buck.

"You don't have any idea what to do, do you?" Miroku shook his head.

"Hey, you fucking raise yourself and see how much shit you know about your history, asshole. Now c'mon, what the hell do we have to do here, Myouga."

"It's a simple procedure," Myouga said, "You will need to find the place where her scent is the strongest and bite her there. If you taste her blood at that point and take it into your body, you should be mated properly."

"Where her scent is the strongest? I'm not biting her THERE!" Miroku blurted out. "That's far too sensitive a place to bite!"

Myouga blushed again. "No, not… I'm sorry to tell you this, Master Inuyasha, but your friend has a very perverted mind!" Myouga's voice was offended and rather embarrassed. "The scent you are detecting from your mate originates from a different place for each person. It is more a spiritual scent than a physical one. The one scent that remains the same no matter the mood or surroundings. A smell that has special meaning for you."

"Vanilla," Miroku breathed.

"Ramen," Inuyasha said quietly.

They both looked at each other.

"Ramen? Kagome smells like _ramen_ to you? And it turns you on??" Inuyasha was obviously a more disturbed creature than he'd first believed.

"Hey, I like ramen, so fucking what? Good food smells sexy! Better than some crappy sugary smell like vanilla!"

They glared at each other until Myouga cleared his throat.

"As I was saying, you'll have to find that spot on your respective females to create a mating bond."

Miroku and Inuyasha looked at each other and groaned slightly. "Trying to find the right spot is gonna result in a lot of getting pounded into the ground, I think, monk."

"I concur. Although I think you may have a better chance than I, at this point. Sango doesn't let me get anywhere near her, now that she has these beads to abuse."

"Oh, I hadn't realized you have the beads of subjugation as well. How unfortunate," Myouga sighed. "It's truly too bad that you have been turned into a hanyou, Miroku, or you could use your spiritual powers to take them off. Although they couldn't be used on you if you were still human, of course, so I suppose that wouldn't matter, in any case."

"He hasn't lost his spiritual powers," Inuyasha said, suddenly staring intently at Miroku. "Did you even fucking _try_ to get the beads off?"

"N-no. I've seen you try so often, I already knew they wouldn't come off, so I never…" He looked down at his beads with wide eyes. Could he? Reaching up, hands shaking slightly, he grasped the beads. Taking a deep breath, he yanked, and they slid smoothly over his head. He stared at them in his hands, mouth open, brain stuttering.

"I could have taken them off the entire time?" he asked silently. "Damn it, the entire time! I could have avoided this entire week if I'd simply tried to take them off??"

He turned to look at Inuyasha, expecting a spate of mocking sarcasm, and almost fell over as he found the hanyou on his knees in front of him. "I'm fucking sorry for lying to you about the sex, for every fucking time I ever hit you or cursed at you or whatever I did that ever pissed you off, and I will never fucking do it again if you will just TAKE THESE DAMN BEADS OFF!"

Miroku blinked. After having lived through this experience himself, there was no way he was leaving Inuyasha subjugated if he could do anything about it. "I can't promise anything, but let me see if I can manage this. I have to admit, I truly hate these things now," he muttered, reaching out. He placed his hands around the beads and carefully pulled it over Inuyasha's head, staring at it in his hands.

"YES!" Inuyasha leapt into the air, whooping as he landed and did an impressive double somersault as he leapt again, bouncing off a couple of trees on his way down. "Oh fucking A, YES!" he grabbed Miroku around his waist and swung him around in the air while the monk pounded on his shoulders.

"Thank you, you stupid lech! Fucking Gods, this feels WONDERFUL!"

"Let me down, you idiot!" Miroku finally managed to make the ecstatic hanyou drop him back to the ground and started grinning. The only time he'd ever seen the hanyou that ecstatic was when he found out Kagome was still alive after they'd thought a youkai had managed to kill her.

Panting, Inuyasha finally stopped leaping for joy and stood looking at Miroku, his eyes starting to glow. "Oh, you have no idea how much I'm looking forward to seeing Kagome right now, monk," he chuckled darkly. "She's gonna find herself mated so fast her eyes will spin."

Miroku smiled a little. If he really thought Kagome would mind, he might have tried to prevent it, but it was so completely obvious that the girl was in love with Inuyasha that he was positive she wasn't exactly going to mind being together with the white haired idiot. She might not like no longer having the upper hand, but that necklace would have had to leave for their relationship to really progress in the first place, so he didn't regret taking it off.

He regretted not taking it off sooner, actually. He'd simply never thought of it before.

"What about you, monk? Are you going after Sango?" Inuyasha asked curiously.

"I…don't know. I suppose I don't have much choice, do I?" he asked.

"Not if you have any liking for sex. And I know that's not in question."

"Eh, no."

"And if there's ever a good revenge for her subjugating you, mating her has got to be high on the list," he said, grinning a little.

Miroku smiled back slowly. "There is that." He thought a moment, Sango's scent creeping into his memory, and he flushed as he grew hard yet again. He growled. "Let's go, Inuyasha. She'll just have to put up with me, because I honestly cannot live like this without going insane."

"All right! Let's go take a mate!" Inuyasha whooped again and ran off like an idiot towards camp, Miroku following, embarrassed that he was running just as quickly as his friend, but unable to slow down one bit.

He REALLY wanted to have sex again. If it had to be with Sango, so be it.


	4. HiHo, the Derryo

Disclaimer: The characters of InuYasha are not mine, they are property of Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

A/N **PLEASE READ**

First, thank you for all the reviews. They've been lovely.

Second, I wanted to correct a possible misconception. Miroku and Sango – this particular story is set fairly early in the Inuyasha series. Miroku and Sango have only known each other for a few months at this point. Miroku is still in the early days where he had less of a conscience and was definitely more of a lecher. Sango still didn't really trust him or Inuyasha more than she could throw them. However, I wanted to reassure everyone that their attitudes will change, and everyone will, I hope, get their just desserts. You'll see why I mention this after this particular chapter: someone is being a bad, bad boy.

Third, this is the extent of what I have written so far, so it may be a bit longer wait for the next chapter!

Warnings: language, sexual discussions, a little groping, (nope, no lemon)

**Chapter 4 – Hi-ho, the Derry-o, the Monk Takes a Wife**

Miroku stopped Inuyasha just before his friend would have burst into the camp, yanking him behind a convenient clump of bushes.

"What the hell are you doing, Monk?" Inuyasha glared at him, his claws flexing as he crouched low.

"We need to keep our heads! We can't simply rush in like some…some… rampaging barbarians." Especially as that might mean Miroku would end up with a mate. Just one woman, for the rest of his life. One pair of lips, one set of breasts, one ass, one-admittedly probably amazing- tight heat to sheath himself in…

…damn but he really wanted to have sex…

But…this would be FOREVER. He would never have another woman ever again. And while they had only taken a few minutes to get back to camp, it was long enough for the idea of 'eternity with one woman' to burrow under his skin. Miroku wasn't sure he wanted a mate anymore.

Honestly, what was he thinking? Taking Sango as a mate? Was he crazy? Had Myouga slipped something into his blood when he'd bitten him? Because he couldn't see any other reason why he had fallen so easily into the idea of mating with Sango. Why would he? He wasn't ready to settle down with one woman, no matter how sexy or fascinating she was. Truly, it was ridiculous that this stupid half-youkai body thought he should dedicate himself to a single female. If he looked at it logically, he should be planning for when he WASN'T a hanyou anymore. After all, if he and Sango mated, then he would be obligated to stay with her, even after he had his human body returned to him. If he didn't…

What would happen if he didn't do this? Could he just seduce Sango for the moment and then stop their relationship once he was his old self again and her scent no longer affected him? If he could, it would make more sense for him to simply seduce her. Then they would both be free to leave when the time came to end things.

Not that he didn't think he'd enjoy his time with Sango. There was a reason he'd been pursuing her for such a long time! But he simply wasn't a man designed for monogamy. Never had been, never would be. He was sure of it. So it followed that once he returned to his original body, he needed to be free to explore the wonders that the female of the species had to offer. And Sango, she wouldn't want to be tied to him any more than he did. She would appreciate his good sense once the entire affair was over, surely? She had to prefer a short relationship of that nature with him rather than a miserably unhappy husband…mate…for the rest of her life. It would benefit Sango as well, after all. Once they were through with each other, she could go on and find a suitable man for herself, albeit one who couldn't possibly make her feel as good as Miroku planned to.

Miroku shifted uncomfortably as he imagined Sango's future husband, envisioning a handsome young man coupling energetically with her pale body. He dismissed the unattractive image at once. No, a pretty boy would never do for her. She needed someone with more maturity. A rich daimyo, perhaps? He saw Sango in his head, dressed in silks as her husband embraced her. Moaning as the she was slowly divested of her clothing, piece by piece.

Hn.

That wouldn't do. She would be too uncomfortable with that sort of…activity. He should know; she'd known him for months now and still hadn't let him under her blankets. If she couldn't be intimate with a close friend, she certainly wouldn't want some stranger touching her. She'd be much happier being taken care of by an older man. One with wealth and taste and compassion. One with the necessary wisdom to appreciate the unique woman that was Sango.

One in his eighties.

One who was old enough that he would rarely trouble her with pleasures of the flesh.

He frowned, worrying his lip. That still didn't seem quite right. Maybe Sango would prefer to be celibate after their affair. Not during it, of course. Just…after.

A heavy thump to the top of his head jarred him from his thoughts.

"Oy, what the fuck's wrong with you!" Inuyasha scowled as he hissed quietly. "You stop me from getting Kagome and now you just crouch there like an idiot mumbling to yourself? What the hell are we stopping for?"

"Oh…ah…just, it's simply that…perhaps we should think this through. I mean, we don't want to think so much with our little heads that we lose sight of what our larger heads can tell us, do we?" Miroku hoped he sounded reasonable and not at all as worried about the mating as he really felt.

"Think this through?? Are you fucking nuts? Just because I was a little confused on the details doesn't mean I haven't been thinking about it! I've thought about taking a mate for the last 100 years! If I ever found a mate, I was going to grab her. The fact that Kagome is the one is just…"

Miroku emerged briefly from his self-involved cocoon as Inuyasha smiled, a curious combination of wicked anticipation and amazed wonder. Miroku felt a pang of envy at the sight of it.

"Well, all right, so you've already dealt with this situation in your head. As this is still a rather new thought for me, however, I think it might be more prudent to forgo the mating for the moment and simply pursue a more physical relationship. I could make the final decision to mate once I have had a chance to think about..."

To Miroku's surprise, Inuyasha's eyes narrowed rather fiercely. "I don't think so, monk."

"Eh?" What was Inuyasha so angry about?

"Youkai don't insult their partners that way, houshi. And I sure as hell ain't gonna let some hanyou insult one of MY friends that way, even if that hanyou is you."

"But…I'm not insulting her! I'm just…"

"Yes, you are! Mates aren't some...whim, dammit! You want to have sex with your mate, you MAKE her your mate…just like I'm gonna have to do. You don't use a chosen mate as some sort of fucking toy to pass the time, Miroku! Mating's…well, it's sacred!"

"Sacred?" They were talking about the same thing here, weren't they? "Inuyasha, I can understand that this is important to you, but…I'm not a hanyou!"

"Could've fooled me, dog-ears."

Miroku matched Inuyasha's scowl. "You know what I mean! I'll be a human again someday! I don't believe it would be right for me to…emulate hanyou customs when it comes to something like this."

"Nice try, lech, but it's not gonna work. You can mate her or do without."

"Inuyasha, I refuse to engage in a discussion over this. We can work out the details of the thing later, when…"

"You want details? How's this. Your dick gets anywhere near Sango without biting her first, and I swear I'll cut the damn thing off."

Miroku stared at him, absolutely stunned. "You can't be serious."

"Don't I look serious?" Miroku watched him a moment and blanched at the look in his friend's eyes.

He was serious? Inuyasha was actually threatening to…

"Look, monk, I know you like to flirt all the hell over the place, but that's done now. You don't know that you're ever bein' human again, and your hanyou body has found its soul mate. Whatever stupid shit you wanna do to yourself, I'm not gonna let you do it to Sango too. You wanna have sex, suck it up and take her as a mate. You don't want her as a mate, then you better start building up the muscles in your hand, 'cause it's going to get a whole lot of exercise over the next few years."

"But…"

"You're a HANYOU now. There's youkai rules even we have to follow, dolt."

"Well that's just…that's… This is ridiculous! I just want sex…I don't want a partner for life!"

"Too damn bad. You gotta decide right now, Miroku. What's more important: getting to have sex with more than one woman, or getting to have sex AT ALL in the next few years…possibly until Sango dies."

Miroku crouched next to him, unable to force his mind to make such a horrendous choice until Sango's scent chose that moment to drift over and harden his dick painfully. What if Inuyasha was right? What if he never turned back? If that happened, if Inuyasha kept to his ridiculous stance on mating, it would be sex now, or not for years.

Could he deal with that? No sex, for 10 years, or 20, or 30…50??

The scent increased and he whimpered softly. He didn't think he was going to last 10 minutes, let alone 10 years!

"Fine. Dammit fine, I'll take her as a mate, you hide-bound, archaic bastard," he snarled.

"Good…let's fucking get going then!"

"No! Wait!" Miroku looked through the bushes at the group. "You think Kagome will ever forgive you if you do anything like this in front of Shippou? We need to get rid of him." Miroku peered through the bushes at the two women currently setting up for dinner and then watched Shippou as he chattered with them. How the hell were they going to get some privacy for this? He hadn't thought…

"No problem. I got this covered." Grinning, his anger already fading now that he'd won, Inuyasha raised his voice just enough to reach Kirara without alerting Kagome and Sango. "Hey, Kirara." He waited until she raised her head and looked over towards him. "I'm calling in my favor. Think you can take Shippou and keep him safe somewhere for the night?"

The fire neko stared at him for a few moments before she suddenly flamed into her larger form and plodded over to pick up Shippou in her teeth.

Miroku could hear Kagome and Sango laughing about Kirara helping babysit as the cat took to the air with the grouching kitsune. Miroku smiled. Whatever the implications, no matter what happened to his future, at least tonight he was going to get under Sango's kimono. Finally!

"Feh, that was easy," Inuyasha gloated. His eyes watched Kagome's every move. Miroku felt a bit envious. He might be as eager to go after Sango if he felt as deeply for her as he knew his friend did for Kagome. But he just didn't. How could he? She was too strong, too modest, and definitely too damn quick with a slap. Admittedly, she was very beautiful…and brave. Loyal, kind, passionate… He watched her still laughing with Kagome and he smiled slightly. She had a lovely laugh.

Sango's smell hit him straight on again. Lemons. Vanilla and lemons. It really didn't feel fair that she possessed such a fantastic smell. She resisted him so totally, and yet that smell made it impossible for him to have anyone else, and Inuyasha, the idiot, was making it so that it was going to be a permanent condition! It was so unfair!

Miroku swallowed suddenly as he watched her bend over to set down a bowl of food and his claws dug into the soft earth under him.

Then again, being able to see that ass without clothing might just be worth it.

Miroku barely finished his thought before Inuyasha stood up and marched out of the bushes. He got up a bit clumsily and followed. He didn't even think Inuyasha saw him any more as the hanyou walked straight over to Kagome, grabbing her around the waist. She squealed in surprise and then Miroku lost track of her as he stopped Sango from going to Kagome's rescue by wrapping his hand around her wrist.

Sango startled, her eyes quickly flaring in irritation as she realized who was holding onto her.

"Let go, Miroku," she ordered, glaring at him.

"Not this time." He was proud of the fact that he managed not to moan. Damn, she was pissed, and there came the vanilla and cherries in the air. Truly, he had no idea how he managed to stop himself from coming every time that scent hit him.

"Miroku… Hentai!"

Smiling broadly, Miroku reveled in the look of shock that crossed Sango's face.

"Hentai!"

"I'm afraid that word has lost its bite, Sango love," Miroku purred, pulling on her wrist to drag her closer. "And now, I think we have some –OW!" He flinched back as the heel of Sango's other hand slammed into his nose.

"You didn't have to hit me!" Miroku rubbed his poor nose a moment before blocking another strike aimed quite a bit lower. "Oh, now, that is NOT a nice place to aim for, Sango," he chided as he grabbed her other wrist. He was forced to make their relationship legitimate, and again, she had absolutely no appreciation of the suffering he was going to go through on her behalf. His eyes narrowed. Sango, you are going to enjoy your seduction whether you like it or not.

He brought her hand up to his face a moment, kissing the inside of her wrist as he watched her cheeks flame. He inhaled subtly before bringing her other wrist up for the same treatment. Damn, the scent wasn't coming from her hands or wrists. It didn't smell close enough to be her arms, either. He supposed that would have been too easy. The only problem now was that if it wasn't on her arms, it was going to be somewhere more…intimate. He salivated a bit thinking of it, even as he just knew he was going to suffer during the search. Sango was not going to be happy about this.

"Y-you hentai!" Sango snapped, yanking at her hands.

Hentai again? His eyes narrowed. She might not be happy about this, but personally, he was going to enjoy the hell out of it.

"You've used that word an awful lot this week, Sango. I don't think you know exactly what that word means." He smiled at her. "Yet."

He put both her wrists in one hand and pulled her in close, wrapping his other arm around her shoulders as he brought his face in close to hers. Just far enough from her skin to breathe in her scent, he tried to track down the vanilla smell that was still keeping him hard and aching. She stared at him wide eyed for mere moments before she was struggling and kicking. It wasn't very effective until she started yelling. The sound of her voice was a lot more painful to his ears than her blows were to his body.

"What do you think you're doing, Houshi?! Let go of me!"

Miroku flattened his ears to his head as he shifted his grip lower, picking Sango's body up by the waist until her breasts were at eye level. Her voice got louder as she struggled to pull her wrists free, kicking her legs against his own, and Miroku brought his face close to her chest.

"Get away from there, you pervert! Hentai monk! You lech, don't you dare come near me!!"

"I'll just be a moment, Sango," he murmured, although he wasn't certain she heard him over her and Kagome's voices. Miroku could hear Inuyasha being maligned in creative ways as Kagome yelled even more loudly than Sango.

Comparing the pain of Sango's flailing versus the agony her much less powerful voice had caused, he found himself grateful that his body had picked Sango rather than a louder Kagome. Considering how strong Sango was, that was saying something! As it stood, Miroku was rather shocked at the fact that he was still managing to hold on. Thanks the gods I'm a hanyou now, he thought, or I'd already be knocked flat at this point.

Although come to think of it, if I wasn't a hanyou, then I wouldn't have to go through this in the first place, dammit.

Taking deep breaths, he focused on the rounded flesh, just covered by thin cloth, in front of his nose. If he wasn't holding on to her so tightly, he was positive his hands would be shaking. Sango's breasts were in front of his face. Right there. If he wanted to, he could bury his face in them and…gods the woman smelled good.

He flinched as she leaned down and screamed in his ear.

"Don't you DARE put your face there! Hentai!"

Miroku sighed as he realized the scent wasn't coming from there either. How beaten was he going to be before he found the stupid place? Holding off on flinching again as she got in another kick against his thigh, he changed tactics and took her to the ground. He managed to get her arms above her head, and sat on her just below her pelvis. So, not the head, not the neck, not the arms, not the chest…he looked down at her hips and swallowed. All right, so he wanted to get there eventually, he just wasn't sure he was going to be able to bite her anywhere near the apex of her thighs without even further injury.

Potentially serious injury. How the hell was he going to do this? How was Inuyasha doing this?? He took a moment to find Inuyasha and he scowled as he saw him pinning Kagome in a similar position a few feet away. Had he already bitten her? He watched Inuyasha lean over and…was he kissing her neck? He HAD bitten her! And he was already trying to take her body! Just because Kagome must have had an easy to mark spot, Inuyasha thought he could…

Miroku raised his voice to be heard over the yelling. "What are you doing?!"

Inuyasha's head reared up and he stared back at Miroku in surprise, taking in his position over Sango. "What do you mean, what am I doing, what are YOU doing?"

What was that idiot talking about? "What! You…you're the one who said I had to do this!!"

"I didn't mean HERE! We can't do this fucking next to each other, houshi!"

"I agree, which is why you should take Kagome and leave!"

Miroku had to practically bellow as both the girls were yelling at the top of their lungs while they kicked and struggled underneath Inuyasha and Miroku.

"I'm not leaving! I had Kagome pinned first! This is MY spot! You fucking leave, Monk!"

"No! It doesn't matter who was first!" Miroku flinched as Sango tagged his balls and almost broke free for a moment. "Dammit, Sango hits harder! That makes her harder to pick up, so I shouldn't have to move! Kagome's a lot easier to cart around." Hell, there was no way he was picking Sango up again. He was already exhausted from struggling with her even THIS much.

"Kagome is NOT easier to move around! She goes all limp on you like a little kid, it's like carrying pudding. You leave!"

"No!" Why was Inuyasha so stubborn?! "Dammit, Inuyasha, I've had a hard on for the whole week! I can't wait! I need this!"

"I've been aroused for over a damn year, monk! LEAVE!"

Miroku stared at him moment. Well, damn. There was no way a red-blooded male could trump that kind of suffering. Honestly, how could he beat that? Double damn.

He got to his feet, yanking Sango up by the arms and pulling her behind him as he walked away from a triumphant Inuyasha. A few minutes from the camp he grunted and fell to his knees as Sango finally managed to get her stumbling feet under her and kicked him in the back.

"Stop that." Miroku turned around to face her and blocked another kick. "I'm not going to hurt you."

Sango's eyes were narrowed in fury as she attacked him again. "You lecherous pig! You're letting Inuyasha hurt Kagome? And now you think you're going to… I'm GLAD I put those beads on you!" She panted as she continued to try and kick him and he scowled.

She was glad? She was glad she was hurting him this whole past week? And she actually thought he'd let Inuyasha injure Kagome?? And her stupid scent was cherries and vanilla again and driving him insane and she was just absolutely, completely maddening!

"Trust me, if I didn't have to do this, I wouldn't even be tempted by you at this point, Sango," he snarled. He ignored the raging hard on that called him a liar. "But I no longer have a choice. I'm afraid you'll have to learn to make do with me." He smiled and watched her eyes widen. She froze just long enough for him to take her down again, sweeping her legs and pinning her face down. He sat on her thighs, holding her hands above her head again as he worked his way down her back.

Nothing.

He reached her bottom and sighed in disappointment as he got nothing there either. He'd really been rather hoping he'd be able to sink his teeth into one of those firm cheeks. He had to take a chance and release her hands, turning himself quickly so he was facing her legs as he sat on her back. There weren't exactly a lot of places left! Hurrying, he pressed his stomach against her bottom, enjoyed her angry squeal for a moment, and finally found it. In the soft skin behind her right knee, the vanilla scent was so strong he thought he might drown in it.

She started to kick her legs, bending her legs quickly enough that she got him in the face.

"Sango! Stop that, now. If you would simply cooperate, we could finish this so much more quickly."

"Get off, you lecher! I'd never cooperate with you and your perverted fantasies, hentai… Eeeeek, stop it! Stop!"

Miroku had yanked at her kimono to bare her thrashing knees. Seeing the soft skin of her bare limbs had him wishing again that it had been her bottom. But he'd get to see that before too long anyway, wouldn't he? He looked at her legs, still thrashing. This was it. If he did this, there was no turning back. He'd never have another woman. He took a deep breath and choked on his own saliva as cherry and vanilla swirled into his brain again, making him pant with need. Combined with Sango's squirming, the feel of her bottom against his stomach, and the surprisingly erotic glimpses of her bare calves, her scent was too much. He would give everything he owned if he could just have Sango, right now. His eyes reddened slightly and fell on her legs, holding them still as he bit quickly into the back of her knee, letting her blood coat his tongue. Wow, she even TASTED like vanilla.

Sango screamed.

The red faded from his eyes and he pulled his teeth out immediately. He hadn't expected her to scream. Had it hurt that much? Was it really… He looked at the mark in the back of her knee and frowned. The bite looked painful. His teeth were a lot bigger than he'd thought they were, and now she was... Ah, no, she was crying. He'd made Sango cry. He didn't think he'd ever hurt a woman in his life, and now Sango was crying. And her smell…bitter almonds. It made his nose twitch and at the same time it felt like the bitter smell combined with the vanilla to stab him right in the chest.

The smell actually hurt! And she was still crying.

"Here now, it's all right." He got off and let her roll over, wincing a little at the tears on her cheeks. "I-I'm sorry, I didn't think it would hurt..."

"You BIT me!" Sango glared up at him. Ah no, was her lip actually…trembling?

"Well, yes, b-but it was only a little bite."

"It HURTS!" Miroku scooted away as Sango sat up and put a hand to the back of her knee. It came back bloody. "I can't believe you bit me!"

Miroku stared at her. She looked so betrayed. Which was ridiculous. HE was the one who'd been collared and smashed into the ground the entire week. HE was the one who'd just lost any chance of a sexual encounter with any other woman he would ever meet in his entire life. If it had worked. Had it? Had he done it? Were they mated now?

And why was that damn smell of bitter almonds still there?! It was making his erection disappear completely, which should have been a relief, but it made the rest of him feel absolutely miserable. He hated that smell. Why was she smelling like that??

Didn't she understand what was happening? Didn't she realize that he had just made the biggest sacrifice of his life, just so he could have a little sex without being emasculated afterwards?

Um…that didn't sound so good when he put it that way.

But truly, she shouldn't be this upset. Maybe Sango simply didn't realize what had happened. That would explain it. She must think he'd just lost his sanity and attacked her rather than…well…tying her to him for the rest of her life.

But…it wasn't that bad, was it? She might be a bit surprised, maybe a little miffed at the sudden change in the relationship, but she'd always recovered her equilibrium so quickly over any setback they suffered through, she'd be fine with this. Someday. After she tried to beat him to a pulp, he thought, wincing again.

Maybe if he presented it just right, there was still a chance that he could actually get some of Sango before the sun set. He could tell her what had happened, and they would laugh, and they'd be exploring each other's bodies in no time. He could touch the soft skin along her throat, knead the curves of her body with his hands as his mouth suckled the tips of her breasts… He moaned under his breath.

"Why did you bite me?!" Another tear rolled down Sango's cheek and that dagger of bitter almonds sliced into his chest again.

How could she be crying? Sango just didn't cry. Never.

He couldn't really have made her cry, could he?

"Sango…"

What in the world could he say to make her stop crying??


	5. This isn't Quite What I'd Planned

Disclaimer: The characters of InuYasha are not mine, they are property of Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

A/N This sucks, and I'm sorry for it. Been in a crappy, depressed mood, and that means the funny is hard to get out. But...you've waited quite a while for this, so I feel like I should at least put out what I've managed to get so far. Still, it really does suck. My sincere apologies, and I can only say we'll be working hard to do better next time, and possibly make this sucker better along the way.

Chapter 5 – This Isn't Quite What I'd Planned

Miroku rubbed the back of his neck as he stared at Sango. He'd never thought she'd react like this It made no sense. She didn't even know they were mates yet! At least, he didn't think so. Could she have enough knowledge of youkai customs to know what he'd done? Was that why she was so upset?

She hated being with him that much?

Or was she hurt? That didn't seem right; he'd seen her take a hit from a youkai that bloodied her entire side once, and she hadn't shed a tear. Hell, she'd stood back up and chopped the thing in two before she'd collapsed. So why was she crying? Was this type of bite different? Did it hurt more than normal? Was she in that much pain?? Was it something else?

Tears slowly crept down her cheeks and he swallowed heavily. "Sango, please, it's not so bad, surely?"

He flinched as he found her eyes. Hurt, betrayed – the eyes of the woman he'd first met when her family had been utterly destroyed.

"I never thought you were the type of man to attack a woman." Her voice was so soft he almost didn't hear her as she pushed herself awkwardly to her feet. She kept most of her weight off the leg he'd bitten.

"What?" Attack? He hadn't attacked her! He'd just married her, dammit! That was not an attack, that was…well, it wasn't an attack, whatever it was.

"You've always been a lecher, houshi, but I thought you were better than that." Her scent thick with bitter almonds and tears, Sango stared at him. "I thought… I thought you were someone I could trust…" She turned and started limping back to camp and he jumped to his feet.

"What?!" She accused him of attacking her, and now she was claiming that she'd trusted him? He growled at her back, angry at the damn smell, and the look on her face, and the feeling it was producing in his gut, and damn well everything. "Trust? How can you say that, after everything you've done this week! You can't say you trust someone and collar them with a set of beads like that, Sango! You don't have someone you trust slammed to the ground for merely mentioning your name." He was growling and gnashing his teeth by the time he finished, his fingers tense with the need to claw something.

Sango shook her head and continued walked more quickly, leaving him to follow after her. "I was going to take them off."

Miroku couldn't stop himself from growling louder and she looked back at him quickly. He stopped himself when he saw a flicker of fear cross her face and the smell of bitter almonds and oranges drifted back to him. Sango was afraid of him??

"Don't come near me, Monk." Sango turned completely and arranged herself in a more defensive stance. Miroku stared at her with his mouth open, disbelieving, before he backed up. She truly thought he was going to attack her!

"Sango, I'm not some sort of monster, dammit! I was not attempting to assault you!"

"And what would you call it?" Sango glared at him, not backing down. "You were touching me, you forced me to come out here alone with you, and then you tried to take off my clothes! And Inuyasha is doing the exact same thing to Kagome right now until I go stop him, because you're keeping me here!"

Miroku couldn't say a word. It sounded so awful when she said it that way. But it wasn't! They weren't trying to… to rape them! They were just… It was just that they needed…

"I never thought you'd do it. All this time, you've been so quick to touch any woman you came across, but I always thought you were different underneath. I thought, if you had to restrain yourself and your groping for even a little bit, you could understand how it makes me feel to have to constantly be on my guard, worrying about when I'm going to be groped next! But I never thought you were a rapist, Miroku." She backed away from him slowly, obviously trying to work her way back to Kagome. "I didn't know you at all, did I? I'm such a fool. I thought…" Another tear trailed down her cheek and she angrily wiped it away.

"I am not a rapist!" Miroku didn't know which emotion was more crushing – the pain in his chest or the anger in his belly. "And what in all the hells do you mean, understanding how you feel? I am not ignorant; I am well aware that you shy away from being touched, Sango. "

"That never stops you from touching me, though, does it?" Sango glared at him, still backing away, and he clenched his fists.

Yes, so he touched her without permission. Maybe a lot. But it wasn't that he didn't know her wishes! He simply wanted to…feel her. Her ass was so round and firm it was like it was begging him to pay homage. He was just supposed to ignore that? How could someone ignore that? Every time she turned and her muscles flexed, or she bent down and the fabric of her skirt tightened along the curve of her bottom, or she bent over and that round firmness was vulnerable and ripe and just begging to be caressed – how was someone supposed to ignore that? Every damn move she made was so erotically stimulating, it used to drive him crazy. And since he'd turned hanyou, she smelled just as amazing, and it only added to the desire to just grab her and take her and … and that damn smell was tunneling into his gut like a spear right now and how the hell did he make it stop!

"Dammit, I'm not a rapist!"

"Then what were you doing, houshi?" Sango's eyes dared him to try and come up with a different explanation and he licked his lips nervously.

"It's- I – it's all Myouga's fault. He suggested it." Miroku finally got out, heaving a sigh as Sango finally stopped moving to gape at him.

"Myouga? Myouga thought you should attack me!"

Miroku pulled at his hair. "How many times do I have to say it! I was not attacking you!! He just told us how to figure out where to bite you, dammit!"

Sango was rendered speechless a moment, for which Miroku was immensely grateful as he tried to think of what the hell he was going to say after having blurted out something he meant to keep to himself for a little longer, at least until she'd calmed down.

"You said 'we.' You mean…you and Inuyasha? Inuyasha is going to bite Kagome as well?! What is wrong with both of you??" Sango glared at him before turning suddenly and sprinting back towards the camp.

With a curse, Miroku ran after her. He tried to leap over and ahead of her, but she anticipated and dodged to the side, running underneath a heavy canopy of leaves so that he had to zigzag between trees as he tried to catch her. Damn it, she was going to interrupt Inuyasha and Kagome, and he just knew the two of them were not going to be happy. Kagome had to be happier about this than Sango. They'd be right in the middle, and if Sango tried to stop Inuyasha..

Would he hurt her before he realized it was her, if she attacked him?

He moved faster, tackling her just as she broke into the clearing where they'd camped. "We don't see anything! Seeing nothing, not looking! Just leaving!" Trying to pick up Sango without looking in the direction he could smell them in, he froze as he heard a choked sniffle,

What?

Had Sango been right? Was Inuyasha actually forcing himself on Kagome? Miroku let go of Sango and turned quickly, feeling sick with guilt, and then froze again. Inuyasha was sitting leaning against a tree, looking panicked, while Kagome sat on his lap, sniffling with tears running down her cheeks. Both of them were fully clothed.

"What happened??"

"What the hell does it look like? She's crying!" Inuyasha rubbed Kagome's back awkwardly. Miroku would have tried to speak except for Sango's knee knocking the wind out of his lungs rather harshly.

"Rrrrhrhrhggg."

"You're just as much a pig as Miroku! Let go of her, Inuyasha!"

"She's CRYING! I can't leave her alone if she's crying, bitch! Hey, back off, Sango!" Miroku watched Sango try to latch onto Kagome's arm while Inuyasha shifted to block her with his arms. All Miroku could do was try to get air back into his lungs, desperately striving to stay among the breathing and conscious.

Kagome smacked Inuyasha in the chest and he stopped moving to gape at her.

"Let me go, Inuyasha," she said in a voice that was an interesting blend of watery and angry. The combination worked fantastically to make Inuyasha completely panic and pull his hands away with a sputter as she got to her feet and hugged Sango before bursting into tears again.

Sango patted her back and they both went to the other end of the camp to sit down together and talk in soft voices. After a few minutes, Miroku finally managed to suck in much needed air and dragged himself over to Inuyasha. He collapsed in a heap next to him, watching the women.

"Inuyasha…you didn't-"

"No, I didn't take her like some pig, Miroku!"

"Well, I thought you were already half way there when I took Sango away. How was I supposed to know?"

"No, I was still trying to find where to bite her. Shit, why doesn't everyone think I'm some fucking lecher like you! I just bit her and then…dammit." Inuyasha's ears lay flat and he clenched his fists over each other. "It hurt her, Miroku. I didn't know it would hurt her."

Sighing, Miroku nodded as he slumped over his knees. "I know. Sango actually cried."

"Bull shit."

"No, she really did. Thought I was going to rape her or something" Miroku turned to look at Inuyasha. "Am I really that untrustworthy? I still can't believe she thought I would come after that way…"

"I dunno what Kagome thinks." Inuyasha said glumly, "I bit her and she screamed. It was fucking awful." He glanced at the two women and hunched his shoulders. They both sat silently, listening to the murmurs from the women as they opened Kagome's first aid kit and brought out bandages to tend each other.

"Where did you have to bite her?"

"In the neck. It was pretty damn hard, too. I was worried if she moved wrong I'd hit an artery or something. Myouga never mentioned that would be a problem when he pulled his scholar of all youkai shit. How about you?"

"Back of the leg."

Inuyasha looked at him and smirked. 'Bet she kicked the shit out of you. That'd explain why your face looks like it got hit with a tree."

"Does it? Feels more like a whole damn forest." Mriroku muttered, poking at tender spots along his cheekbone. " I think we really screwed up."

"No kidding. We've got mates who think we're the lowest bastards ever right now. Crap, it's a fucking mess."

Miroku brooded and finally asked, "How much do you like Myouga?"

"Little bit."

"Enough to keep me from killing him the next time I see him?"

"Yeah. 'Fraid so. If you beat him 'til he wishes he were dead, though, I might help you."

"Good."

The smell of vanilla and cherries blew his way and Miroku snarled to himself as his dick popped up like a puppet.

"Dammit all to every hell, known and unknown," he snarled desperately. " I can't stay here, Inuyasha." Inuyasha just nodded and didn't move as Miroku pushed to his feet.

Sango and Kagome stopped talking and they both watched him warily.

"I am NOT a rapist!!" Their eyes didn't change and he gouged his palms with his claws as he turned and stomped out of the camp.


	6. In the DogHouse

Disclaimer: The chacters of InuYasha are not mine, they are property of Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

A/N Well, this took me a hell of a long time. Sorry about that. I'm hoping to finish it off within a couple of chapters. I'd have made this one longer, but frankly, right now I have a concussion and I finally gave up. Editing sucks, the chapter's not what I wanted, but darn it, I'm just putting this chapter out so it's out and I can work on the rest! Take care and have a nice weekend!

Chapter 6 - In the dog house

Miroku looked at the back of Inuyasha and wished he were anywhere else. Watching Inuyasha's ass while they walked was, to put the best face on it, not entertaining at all. A male ass in red clothing was a far cry from the appealing curves of female hips in tight-fitting black. And the way Inuyasha walked! He stomped and grumbled, his arms swinging about – there was no way it could be mistaken for the graceful, swaying stride that Miroku would much rather be watching.

Not even if he squinted and crossed his eyes to blur the image.

The only good thing about having the hanyou ahead of him was that Inuyasha was upwind, and he smelled like sweaty dog-demon. Nothing killed an erection faster than smelling _that_. So that was good. Not smelling vanilla and cherries and bitter almonds was….good. His cock wasn't aching and his hands had no urge to grab anything. That was good.

Miroku sighed as he continued walking.

He never thought he'd miss the smell of vanilla so damn much.

Turning his head, he peered behind him, searching out the woman whose smell had been haunting him ever since he'd changed. The wind was blowing the wrong way to catch her scent, but at least he could see her. And her ferocious scowl as she caught him looking, so he turned back and looked at the less frightening trail ahead of them. His ears flicked back to listen for the sound of hiraikotsu, just in case.

The girls had refused to travel any further with either of them since they day they were bitten, two night before. Unless the two males took the lead when they traveled, they'd claimed they wouldn't even travel with them anymore. He wasn't so sure of that – they'd been together so long, surely they wouldn't simply abandon them for one, small thing? But when he'd argued the point with Inuyasha, his friend had pounded on his head so hard that he'd agreed just to keep his brains where they were supposed to be.

So for two days now, he and Inuyasha had trooped ahead of the group on the trail, Inuyasha insisting on being first. Eyeing the men with suspicion and equally angry stares all day long, the women had sat next to each other, walked next to each other, even slept next to each other! And they wouldn't say a single word to Inuyasha or himself - they sent over Shippou with messages rather than talk to them. It was like living in a small armed camp, where he and Inuyasha were the invaders.

With lice, bad breath, and dirt under their nails - at least that's what one would think from their behavior.

He'd been treated like a pariah before, but this was above and beyond, especially when he was accused, and convicted, of doing something he'd never done. Usually, at least he'd participated in the theft or seduction that he was paying for. At least that way he'd gotten something out of it.

He was getting really tired of this, he thought, stabbing the ground with his staff particularly hard. Sango and he were stuck together; the mating had worked. He and Inuyasha had compared notes, and neither of them had any doubt about it. The signs were there. There was something about Sango's smell, something that reminded him of himself whenever it hit his nose, and Kagome's made him think of Inuyasha. It didn't seem to smell any different, but somehow, it still brought the images to mind. Considering Inuyasha experienced the same sensation, that was conclusive enough for both of them.

Although of course it made Miroku curious as to why it was happening. Inuyasha thought it was a protective device, so you didn't fuck with someone else's mate. Miroku just knew that it made it clear he'd have to talk to Sango sometime soon or they were never going to solve this, and Inuyahsa and Kagome were going to have to do the same.

Ignoring each other and talking through Shippou might make the women feel better, but it wasn't going to solve the problem.

And it was making him feel like shit besides, which he really didn't enjoy feeling. He wanted to be able to feel like a normal man – hanyou- again and not like someone who was carrying the plague

"I am not a damn rapist," he muttered.

"I heard you the firs billion times, lech. I know you're not a rapist, Shippou knows your not a rapist, the damn bees know you're not a rapists. So shut the hell up about it already, because we don't care!"

Inuyasha's eyes looked shadowed as he glared back at him, much worse that Miroku looked, he was sure. His friend was nearly crushed by Kagome's continued rejection of him, and so far, neither of them had been able to get the girls to listen to what they were trying to say.

The girls didn't know they had mates now. They didn't know they were stuck with them forever, and they didn't know that it would be in their best interested to kiss and make up, especially the kissing part. That should be without question – lots of the kissing part. A box full of kisses would do for all of them right now.

Make up kisses. And he didn't care if he was trying to make up or Sango was, he just wanted the kissing.

Miroku felt his cock twitching and groaned under his breath. Inuyasha's smell should was supposed to take care of that. Like an erection preventative. Miroku's mind couldn't possibly be so lecherous that the mere thought of kissing Sango could…

… that would be so wonderful, wouldn't it? She had the firmest lips, just that little bit plump. Like the globes of her ass with that muscled roundness that was so perfect if you cupped your hands just so and-

"Ow!" Miroku rubbed his face where it had just run into Inuyasha's back.

"Shut up, idiot!" Inuyasha hissed. The hanyou's ears were twitching wildly as he sniffed the air. "You smell that?"

Miroku sniffed tentatively and wrinkled his nose at the stench that hit it. "What the hell is that?" he whispered back.

"Naraku."

Naraku? It smelled like 1000 year old rot that had been left in the sun and drowned in a cesspool. No wonder Inuyasha always said he could recognize his stench. Who would ever be able to forget _this!_

"It's not him – it's too spread out – it's gotta be something working for him. Warn the girls."

"Huh? Why should I have to?! They won't even speak to me, and you know it."

Inuyasha turned to glare at him and Miroku stepped back. There was the barest hint of red in his eyes.

"Monk, I'm not fucking around here. The smell shouldn't be this strong. Whatever it is smells _huge_, so either we're getting' one hell of a youkai surprise, or a whole hell of a lot of them. We gotta deal with this and figure out all the other…shit…later. And _you_ get to do it because you can't use your nose good yet. You got something jumping out at you, it ain't gonna help you to smell them because you're pathetic at tellin' direction with it. So suck it up and go tell the women!"

Miroku nodded and turned around. He could feel his back twitching. Inuyasha might be irritating, but it was rare that he got this upset over something. Grumpy as hell, yes, but he seemed genuinely worried, and that was something else altogether. With a couple bounds, Miroku landed in front of the women and ducked as Sango swung out her hiraikotsu at his head before he could open his mouth.

"Dammit, Sango! I am not going to attack you!"

"That's just what you're doing now!" She retorted, swinging at him again.

He jumped over it and growled at her before she could do it again. "Naraku's up to something."

The swings stopped and Sango stepped back. Kagome was already getting her arrows out and Kirara transformed before Miroku could draw breath again.

"What?" Sango asked, readying her weapon. Miroku noticed grumpily that she didn't even apologize for thinking he had nefarious intentions. But then again, she was stubborn like that. Maybe some day he could get her under him and kiss her belly until she said she was sorry…

"Houshi, what's going on with Naraku?" Sango barked and broke him from his reverie.

"Eh…Inuyasha wasn't sure. But he said it smelled like something very large, or numerous. I think we should be extremely careful about this or we could be in trouble. So stay focused. He went on to see what he could find."

The women had to be content with that and Miroku turned to lead the way down the path. There was a bend in the road where it went into the nearby forest. They all slowed as they entered. The scent was very strong here, and he told them as much. Inuyasha was nowhere to be seen, and there wasn't a sound of him up ahead.

But there wasn't anything else either. The birds were silent, the insects quiet, and the only sounds that Miroku could pick up were the sounds of their feet scuffling on the dirt path. Miroku thought that maybe he could make out the sound of a stream a long way to the east, but that worried him more.

If he was actually hearing something far away, why wasn't he hearing Inuyasha? The hanyou should be a clear as a bell. And so should whatever was from Naraku. It made him so tense he knew his ears were twitching, and it brought to mind all the times the rest of them would use Inuyasha's ears to figure out what he was feeling. He wished he didn't have the same give away, but he couldn't stop it. Where the hell was that damned, irritating, red clad hanyou? And what was going on?

"I can't hear Inuyasha anywhere," he whispered quietly.

Kagome sucked in a stuttering breath. "I-I'm sure he's fine," she said softly. Miroku could hear the quaver in her voice and a few things clarified within his head. Their battles with Naraku had been growing increasingly more difficult, with more than one of them often injured by the end, sometimes severely.

And his wind tunnel had been getting bigger lately. He hadn't used it since he'd turned hanyou, so perhaps his new constitution might grant him more time before his kazaana consumed him, but it was getting closer.

Every time he had to use it now, he ran the risk of it breaking loose. It had been that way for months, every time feeling like he was gambling with his life on the next moment as it opened and expanded, just slightly. If this was the end, he didn't want to die with this trouble between him and Sango.

"Sango," he said softly. He didn't turn around, although he could tell she heard him. "You know I wasn't trying to attack you, don't you?"

Sango grumbled under her breath, but he could practically feel the serious worry laying itself over her own mind as well. "I don't know _what_ you were doing, houshi. It certainly felt like being attacked. And neither you nor Inuyasha have offered any other explanation, so what –"

"You haven't let us get near enough to try," he shot back. "This isn't something I'm going to relay through Shippou!"

It was quiet behind him for a moment.

"All right, then. I'm listening now."

Miroku glanced back at her, saw she was serious, and turned around again. "We can't talk about this now! I was just checking to see…I didn't want you to think something that wasn't true, that's all that I was concerned with. It's a terrible time to have an involved discussion with you, Sango."

"I disagree. I think it's the perfect time to talk about this. You have to concentrate on what's around us, and where Naraku might be, and that means that you can't focus so much on lying. This might be the only way I get an honest answer from you."

"Now that hurts, Sango. What have I ever done to make you think I wouldn't give an honest answer?"

"We don't have time to list them all. I mean it, Miroku. You can tell me right now. I don't know if I want to listen if you feel like you need to focus on lying just to tell me."

Miroku cursed in his head. Scanning the woods, still trying to figure out where Inuyasha's scent was leading them, or where his hanyou friend actually _was_, he didn't want to talk about this right now.

But he was going to be stuck with Sango for a long time.

And her scent was vanilla and jasmine now – very strong. Looking back at her calm looking face, it was strange to realize how upset she actually was. He didn't think he'd be telling her any time soon just how much her scent was giving away. But right now, damn, this was going to be hard.

Walking ahead, he took a deep breath. How to go about letting her know everything?

"Eh, well, Sango, you see…" Was that a branch cracking? Miroku turned his head as he kept talking quickly. "The problem was that you and Kagome smell."

"What?"

Miroku winced at the loud screech and flattened his ears. That hadn't come out right at all.

"I didn't mean it like that!" He ducked his head as he walked, just in case there was a hiraikotsu swing with his name on it. "It's a good smell!"

Nothing slammed into his head and Miroku started to relax until he heard Kagome's tentative question. Damn, he hadn't been thinking about her hearing as well. His mind was really not focusing right now.

"We smell nice?"

He nodded, moving his head back and forth while he tried to concentrate on what he was sensing around them. Something felt…oppressive. A demonic aura in…the west. Miroku took the fork in the path that headed the right direction.

"Yes." He inhaled and Sango's scent wrapped around his entire body like it was blocking out the horrible Naraku stench. "Very nice," he murmured.

Something new hit his nose, the familiar vanilla with something unexpected – strawberry. It distracted him so much he had to glance back again. And saw her blushing slightly. He felt his whole body respond. She might be angry at him lately, but a few words and she was blushing. That had to be a good sign. She was so beautiful, flushed and sweet and –

And looking behind him with surprised eyes as she obviously noticed something. He whipped around, staring, and for the first time he realized that the shadow lying across their path far down the trail was no such thing. It was a pit. The dank smell was just reaching his nose, along with Inuyasha's.

From the pit.

Damn. He hated going underground.

Sango started walking down the trail towards it and he stepped aside and kept pace. She glanced at him.

"So, you can't control yourself when you smell something good, is that it? So you attacked me?"

"I didn't attack you!!" With a scowl, Miroku clenched his fists and started trying to think of a way to explain it in the few minutes they had before they got to the pit.

"Well, he couldn't control himself when he couldn't smell, so it's not like it's a surprise now," Shippou muttered.

Kagome chuckled and Sango smiled before she firmed her lips.

"I had perfect control before I changed, I'll have you know!"

Sango's eyes narrowed. "So, you meant to grope me every time you did it, is that it?"

His ears flattened as he realized what he'd said. "Eh, that's not what I meant. I only meant that… Well, you see…"

"Yes?" She stared at him, in a way that he knew would have her tapping her foot if they'd been standing still, and he cursed again.

They needed to get to the damn underground crevice before he dug his own grave.


End file.
